Total pages in book: 128
Estimated words: 119011 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 595(@200wpm)___ 476(@250wpm)___ 397(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 119011 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 595(@200wpm)___ 476(@250wpm)___ 397(@300wpm)
Seconds ago, Rain looked as if she had been ready to mock him senseless despite the silent promise, but the pity that passed through her features was even worse. “Well… I’m sorry to hear that, but not everyone falls in love so easily. Sometimes, you don’t meet the right person for a long time. When Mona came into my life, I was so certain she wasn’t the one. I saw her as a liability and tried to resist that pull, write it off as just sex. Maybe you should just relax with the expectations and go with the flow?”
There was only one ‘flow’ Leo wanted to go with right now, but Zolt hadn’t even bothered to try and entice him again.
“But what if that flow leads me nowhere? And then, at sixty, I’ll realize I’ve wasted all that time chasing ‘flows’ when I could have been building a life with my soulmate. It’s called a ‘soulmate’ because everyone’s supposed to have one, right?”
Rain shrugged, the angular lines of her face sharpening as she hollowed her cheeks, lost in thought. “I think it’s not very smart to rest all your expectations for the future on someone else. Besides, if a soulmate is what you need, then settling for someone who fits the narrow brackets in your life plan is the last thing you should do. If you’ve never been in love with any of those girls you dated, then maybe you’re looking for love in the wrong place? Food for thought,” she said, clinked their bottles once more, and downed her beer.
Leo sighed, because his mind kept drifting back to that kiss with Zolt, to the way Zolt had expressed his lust for him. It had been incredibly arousing, but also wrong on so many levels. Leo would never hear the end of it if his brothers found out he made out with Zolt for a fair price on his rejected engagement ring. Because admitting that he’d done it because he actually liked it was far too frightening to even ponder, no matter the goosebumps he got every time he remembered Zolt advertising his lack of gag reflex.
“What about kids, though? I want to have them early enough so I can play with them like Dad used to with us.”
“So you’d rather have kids with a woman you don’t love and who’s incompatible with you?”
Leo needed another drink for this conversation. “No, of course not! Can’t you just let a guy complain once in a while?”
Rain leaned closer, and they both watched Mike roll the pretty young girl onto the billiard table and descend on her chest like a starving vulture.
“While we’re on the topic of kids... we’ve been discussing this with Mona a lot,” Rain said, and as the focus shifted to her, Leo’s shoulders relaxed.
Finally, something positive to talk about. “And? You’re planning kids? Tell me everything.” Leo was getting weirdly giddy about being an uncle to kids of someone so close to him.
Rain cleared her throat and leaned forward, resting her elbows on her thighs. “She’ll be the one getting pregnant, but we’re still discussing how to go about it.”
Leo glanced toward the corner, where Dad, Uncle Hank, and the other founding members of the club discussed something amusing over whisky, and it was like looking at the possible outcomes of his own future.
Dad had it all—a large family and the love of the woman he wanted. Uncle Kurt had kids, but he and his ex-wife were estranged, and he’d never even attempted getting married again. Admiral, the club’s sergeant-at-arms, had many girlfriends, and seemed enamored with his partners every time, but all of those relationships came to a crashing end after passionate affairs that lasted a year or two. The last of the old guard, Jag? He was as much of a fuckboy as their brother Mike was, and already past his prime.
Leo nodded. “So what are the options? Sperm bank?”
Rain exhaled, tapping her nails against the bottle. “I mean, ideally, we’d like both of us to be related to the baby.”
Leo frowned. “That’s a tough one. It’s not like you can both—”
“Leo! You can be so dense sometimes.” Rain laughed and slammed her elbow into his side. “We’d like you to be the donor. I know it’s a big thing to ask, and a lot for you to think about, but I wanted to put it out there. But it’s not like you’d have to officially be a dad or anything. Mona and I would be the kid’s parents.”
Leo stared at her with lips parted, and for the first time in weeks, all the thoughts about Zolt’s kisses faded away. “Oh. Wow. I’m not instantly against it, but it’s a big deal, I’ll have to think about it, okay?”
While he knew it was an honor, the thought of having a kid while not being acknowledged as its father stabbed into him like an ice pick and caused more pain than he could have imagined.