Total pages in book: 118
Estimated words: 106646 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 533(@200wpm)___ 427(@250wpm)___ 355(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 106646 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 533(@200wpm)___ 427(@250wpm)___ 355(@300wpm)
Hoots of laughter erupt. Even Lauren looks surprised at my decision, but R'jaal and I'rec are pleased. "Okay, third?" Lauren prompts.
If I don't pick O'jek and Daisy, it'll seem like I'm doing it on purpose. So I pick them.
"Robbed!" Brooke cries, mock-shaking a fist in the air.
"Send her back to the healer," Thrand calls out, laughing. "Clearly she hit her head!" His mate Nadine taps him on the arm, rolling her eyes at him.
I flinch at that, though I try to keep smiling. No matter what I do, it seems I can't do the right thing. It's so frustrating. I tried to spare R'jaal and I'rec and now I've given the rest of the group something to use against me.
"We'll take the hit. You're still in last place, suckers," Brooke taunts the two men, grinning.
"Bah, we will give the remains to the outcast," I'rec says. "He should be glad to get any food."
"Oh no you won't," Steph says indignantly. "We're trying to get him to join us, not run in the other direction."
More laughter erupts through the camp.
"Am I good?" I ask with a bright smile on my face. I'm pretending to have fun, but I really just want to get away. I hate that I've potentially hurt feelings and that I've made a fool of myself in the process. It feels like everything's working against me, which is just ridiculous.
"Sure," Lauren says, smiling. "Thanks for playing. You want seconds—"
"No," I say quickly, and everyone around the fire erupts into laughter again. I smile and slide out of the group, and once I'm at the edge of the shore, I feel like I can breathe again. I take a few gulps of fresh air, trying to calm my mind, and gaze out at the water. No signs of Pak or Juth, which isn't all that surprising. It's too early in the afternoon for them. I almost wish Pak was around, watching me work on clay, so I'd have an excuse to avoid everyone else. Going back to the women's cave would mean cutting through the crowd, and I just want to avoid them and any questions.
There's a plume of smoke coming from Raven's hut. She wasn't at the food game, I realize, and so I head toward toward her hut. As I do, though, A'tam opens the flap to his hut and comes out.
Shit. Talk about bad timing.
I bite back a growl of frustration when he sees me and starts in my direction.
"B'shit," he says, approaching. "Are you well? What did the healer say?" He eyes me with concern, and I don't know if that makes things better or worse. "Here," he tells me, shrugging off his cloak. "Take this. You are cold."
"I'm fine, really," I say, even as he drapes it around my shoulders. "You don't have to do that."
"I do not have to do anything, yet I would like for you to be warm," he tells me. There is none of his argumentative tone today. Instead, he sounds…thoughtful? Distracted? I don't know what to make of it. His gaze moves to the group on the beach as another ripple of laughter starts. "What are they doing?"
"Food contest for the knives," I say. "Some of them are not good. You should go try them, though. I'm sure that would make Daisy happy."
"Mm. No, I am full already." He pats his stomach, and that distracted look is still on his face. "I am taking a walk, I think. I have much on my mind." He pauses, studying me again. "Would…would you like to come with me?"
He sounds curiously hesitant, as if he expects to be turned down but has to offer anyhow. I chew on my lip. Part of me wants to say yes, to just be around him and drink in his presence. To hear his laughter. Last night at the cave made me remember how exhilarating it is to be around him and to be the focus of his attention.
But…I've given people enough to talk about today. And I do need to chat with Raven. I bite my lip and shake my head. "I'll pass."
A'tam nods and turns away.
Immediately, I regret my decision. He's being nice to me. Has been since last night, when we kissed and we could have had sex and I totally chickened out. He's with Daisy, anyhow. Even if they're being somewhat hush-hush about it, he's confessed that she sleeps with him. It'll be common knowledge before the week is out.
Then, I'll be glad I didn't touch him. But today? Today I'm a mixture of regrets and longings. And stupidly, I still want him to choose me instead of Daisy.
So even though I'm pretty sure I'll regret it later, I reach out and touch his arm, stopping him before he walks away. "Thank you for inviting me," I say softly. "And for the fur. It means a lot that you still think of me…especially after last night."