Total pages in book: 118
Estimated words: 106646 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 533(@200wpm)___ 427(@250wpm)___ 355(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 106646 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 533(@200wpm)___ 427(@250wpm)___ 355(@300wpm)
"I am deciding," A'tam says, and veers in a different direction. "We are going to the supply cave this night."
It's on the tip of my tongue to protest, but the angry muscles in my back send a fresh wave of pain through my body and I gasp, clinging to him. I can't even argue, I'm hurting too much. Okay, maybe he was right after all. I press my face against the crook of his neck, breathing deep of his scent. "Thank you," I mumble.
"Just hold on, little kaari," he murmurs. "I will take care of you."
I'm utterly relieved when, a short-but-feels-endless time later we get to the cave. A'tam helps me off his back and I lean against a rock, hunched over, as he makes a fire in the cave. The twin suns are disappearing, the skies turning dark and cold, and I'm glad we're here instead of still heading toward camp. I don't think I could take much more.
"Here," A'tam says, offering me his arm to lean on. "Come and lie down by the fire. I will take care of you."
"I don't need help," I protest, but my back feels like one big cramp, and I end up leaning on him anyhow. It feels good to collapse in the pile of furs he has next to the cheery fire, and I sigh with relief. I stretch out on my side, closing my eyes. Being in pain is utterly exhausting, and yet I can't stop worrying that I'm showing weakness. Is he going to tell the others in Shadow Cat about how he got me alone and how I whined and cried? Is he going to make a fool out of me in front of the others? Will he throw this in my face the next time we argue?
I feel very tired, suddenly, and little of it has to do with pain. I'm just tired of having to constantly be on guard around A'tam. I'm tired of being his enemy when all I wanted was to be…his.
"Tell me if I hurt you," A'tam says in a low voice, and in the next moment, I feel his hands on the laces of my boots. The thick, reinforced leather is damp from trekking through the snows, and I know I should take them off myself. No weakness, my mother reminds me, but when A'tam's warm fingers skate over my good ankle, I'm an utter puddle. I bite back a moan, because it feels so good to be touched like that.
"You shouldn't," I protest weakly.
"Why?"
"Because…you're the tired one," I say, even as he pulls my boot off and places it near the fire so it can dry. "You carried me."
He snorts, his fingers moving over my skin. He rubs my foot, teasing warmth back into cold toes, and then moves to my other boot. "I could carry you for the entire night and it would not be heavy, little kaari."
Oddly enough, I prefer that weird little nickname to “B'shit” or “Bree-shit,” which just gets under my skin every damn time. "You don't have to rub my feet."
"I am seeing if you have broken bones," he says, as if it is the most logical thing ever. "Your foot is not swollen, from what I can tell."
"That's good, right?"
"Very good." His fingers caress my foot oh-so-gently. "Does this hurt?"
I bite my lip. It feels amazing. I don't want to tell him that, though, because he'll smirk and brag and bring it up when we fight again. But oh god, does it feel good. "I appreciate you looking out for me," I say instead. That sounds neutral. Benign.
He rumbles with amusement, his fingers gliding up to my calf. "Why would I not?"
"Because we're not together?"
A'tam says nothing to that. He just keeps rubbing my foot, and I wince when he touches a sore spot. Overall, though, it seems to be all right. Maybe it's just like my back, and I pulled a muscle somewhere. It needs to rest and ice…and luckily we have a lot of ice. A whole damn planet-full of ice.
He carefully sets my foot back down on the furs and reaches for the hem of my tunic next.
Maybe I'm drowsy from the foot rub, but it takes me a moment to realize what he's up to. I let out a yelp of surprise and grab the hem before he can push it up. "W-what are you doing?"
"You enjoyed my foot rub, yes? It helped your ankle?" He lifts his chin, indicating my body. "I will do the same for your back."
"Well you can't just strip me naked!" I clutch the hem, defiant. "Save that for Daisy!"
"You hyoo-mans and your strange ways." A'tam chuckles. "I am not going to grab at your teats. I am going to rub your back and help you. Do you not want me to help?"