Total pages in book: 89
Estimated words: 83379 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 417(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 278(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83379 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 417(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 278(@300wpm)
I stared at the ceiling. “It was…God, so strange. It started like it always does, in the desert, right before the bomb detonates, except this time…” I gasped as realization dawned on me. “All of a sudden I was in an arena.”
His hand stilled in my hair. “What kind of arena?”
“It was a horse race.” My eyes found his. “Mercy’s…Have Mercy. And I saw… I saw his accident.”
His eyes widened. “How could you?”
“I dunno. It was a stupid dream, a figment of my fucked-up imagination.”
“Is that why you yelled out? When you saw Mercy?”
“Yeah…probably. Fuck, I’m sorry I woke you.”
“Shh…it’s okay.” Then Kerry nudged his knee under the covers and pulled me into his arms, and fuck, did it feel good to be wrapped up in all his warmth. “I want to be here for you.”
“Thank you,” I said into his neck, reveling in his scent and wondering what it might be like to wake up that way with him all the time. I quickly thrust the thought from my brain.
“Just hear me out…” he said, and I could feel his voice rumble against the top of my head. “There’s somethin’ about you and that horse. Some sort of connection. And I think you should figure it out while you’re here. What do you have to lose?”
“I guess nothing?”
He kissed the top of my head. “None of this makes you weak. You know that, right?”
“Yeah, I know…” I replied, though I wasn’t sure if I really believed it.
“You’re beautiful and strong, and you rocked my world tonight. I was too shell-shocked to say it on the ride back, but I needed that.”
I drew back. “Even though you think it’s wrong?”
He swore under his breath. “Only because of who you are to Sienna.”
“We could…just find comfort in each other while I’m here. Nobody has to know. What do you have to lose?”
“Touché.” He tenderly brushed my lips with his own, slipped his tongue inside my mouth, and kissed me until I was breathless.
When he slid out of the sheets to return to his room, I latched on to his wrist. “Stay. It feels too good having you in my bed.”
“I can’t.” He looked toward the door, and I already knew what his defense would be. “Not when my daughter and my ex-wife are sleeping down the hall.”
To him, it felt like a betrayal, and I needed to respect that.
I wanted to tell him about my conversation with Sienna. About Brad. But in the end, it wasn’t my place.
“Better go before someone sees us,” I told him, but I didn’t pull away, and he yanked me closer, his hands burrowing in my hair, then leaned down to kiss me one last time. “I want nothing more than to lie back down and hold you all night. I’ve never…done that with a man before.”
Fuck, my heart.
“Then I think we should find a way before I leave.”
20
Kerry
Between the bar and the nightmare, things had felt different between Julian and me. Every gesture meant something more, and even as guilt wormed its way inside, he’d show up to help in the mornings or throw me a subtle or smirky look across the dinner table, and it centered me. Filled me with a soft, incandescent glow that warmed me to my core.
Nothing happened between us since, but just the promise of it made me feel achy all over, and I spent an inordinate amount of time wondering when we could steal more such moments alone.
Resisting the urge to pad to his room in the middle of the night was killing me. Except as soon as I thought of who was sleeping down the hall, it squashed that desire straight away. Besides, I didn’t want to be careless about this desperate sort of attraction, even if it felt entirely mutual. The risk of being found in his bed felt more awful than Sienna discovering gay porn on my laptop. She wouldn’t understand why I was so wildly attracted to her cousin, and she’d undoubtedly feel repulsed, if not betrayed.
So while the idea of having a summer fling appealed to me—it also made me feel a melancholy I couldn’t easily explain, and we needed to be careful about it. I wanted to stay away, but it was nearly impossible where he was concerned. I kept reliving those brief interludes between us, starting with the kiss at the silo that still made my stomach feel like butterflies were beating their wings wildly against my insides. I’d walked down to the silo that day for no good reason, and the resulting make-out session had left me with a boner for hours. And then there was that incredible handjob in the bar’s restroom…and those tender kisses when I held him after his nightmare, hugged him close… But reality had a way of intruding.