Total pages in book: 89
Estimated words: 83379 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 417(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 278(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83379 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 417(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 278(@300wpm)
Still, Aunt Maggie was a good person and would want the best for the people she loved.
“Knowing Aunt Maggie…”
“She’ll get bummed for a while, then come around?” Sienna sighed.
“Yeah, pretty much.” I couldn’t help looking over my shoulder, because right then I’d thought of how Aunt Maggie seemed to have finally softened toward Kerry again.
Sienna must’ve caught my meaning. “She’s accepted it. Took her long enough.”
“You’re referring to…”
“Our divorce.” She motioned toward the house. “Kerry being gay.”
“Mom always said she would. And I’m glad for it.”
“Me too.” She settled back in her seat. “And it’s been nice to have you around. Kerry needs all the friends he can get, and you two seem thick as thieves.”
All I could do was nod because of the boulder lodged in my throat.
“Once Kerry came out…” She shook her head, then glanced beyond the pasture and the line of cottonwood trees.
“What?” I asked in a hesitant voice.
“His family has been pretty rough on him, and I was too for a while.” She frowned. “It’s because I was devastated and didn’t understand. But now I do. It’s not his fault he’s gay.”
“Someone’s sexuality is neither their fault nor their choice.”
“He tried so hard to deny it our entire marriage.” She took another sip of her wine. “And maybe I did too.”
“Huh?” I leaned closer, trying to make sense of what she was telling me.
“We were always good friends more than anything else. Kerry felt familiar and safe to me. Which wasn’t fair to him either.” She screwed her eyes shut. “Does that make sense?”
“Absolutely.”
We fell silent, each lost in our own thoughts. As I stared at the twinkling stars in the night sky, I thought about how I hadn’t truly felt comfortable in my own skin or safe for a long time. And something about being out here made things clearer and muddier at the same time.
“I love how the silo is coming along. You’re talented, Julian.” She sipped more of her wine, and I smiled at the compliment. “I hope being here has worked out for you.”
“Totally. I mean, look at me. Who knew I’d take to a horse?” I grinned, and she returned the smile.
I glanced at the yard for Hamlet and Phoebe, but they were nowhere to be found, so they must’ve been sleeping in Ainsley’s room tonight. I’d miss those little guys when I left.
My gut roiled with a nostalgia I hadn’t felt for a place in a long while. Leaving the desert was more about the work and my brothers, and New York was…well, New York. Magical all on its own but ultimately not for me. But who knew? Maybe I’d feel different when I returned.
“Brad always said that sometimes animals find you just when you need them. ” Her eyes softened with affection. “He had a tough childhood, and there was this stray dog that would follow him to school, and… Sorry, never mind.”
“No, it’s okay. I’d like to hear more about Brad. You seem pretty fond of him.”
A blush crawled across her cheeks.
“I mean the guy is ruggedly handsome.”
Her eyes sprang to mine. “Yeah? What do you know about that?”
“Duh.” I winked. “I do have eyes in my head.”
She sighed dreamily. “Yeah, that’s what everyone said about him in school.”
“Well, he seems pretty fond of you too.”
Her gaze swung guiltily toward the screen door.
“For what it’s worth, I think Kerry will be just fine…and so will you.”
I stood up to say good night, feeling my own guilt creeping in about what happened between me and Kerry. I needed to get to bed before I blurted out a ridiculous confession—either about tonight or my own sexuality.
Except what I shared with Kerry felt sacred, just between us, and damned if I didn’t want to do it all over again. Though maybe not in the bathroom of a bar.
This time sleep came immediately, and it probably had everything to do with that amazing orgasm. But it wasn’t dream free, and before I knew it, I was being shaken awake by strong arms.
“Julian, hey,” Kerry murmured in my ear. “You’re dreaming.”
My eyes squinted open as awareness dawned on me in waves. “Holy shit… Did I…”
I woke him again. Fuck.
My heart was beating erratically as I tried to get my bearings.
He leaned over me and swiped my bangs out of my eyes. “You okay?” he asked in a concerned tone.
I latched on to his hand and held on tight, not wanting to let go for anything.
He gently shushed me as he sat on the edge of the mattress. “You’re not alone. I’m here.”
I nodded, unable to speak, so we just breathed in the same air for a couple long minutes.
His fingers brushed through my hair. “Was it the same kind of dream?”
I shook my head. “This one was different.”
His eyebrows knitted together. “Wanna talk about it?”