Total pages in book: 87
Estimated words: 83085 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 415(@200wpm)___ 332(@250wpm)___ 277(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83085 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 415(@200wpm)___ 332(@250wpm)___ 277(@300wpm)
It didn’t surprise me that he made a joke out of it. I wasn’t hurt by it either because, well, because it was Josh and I knew what this was. I didn’t expect him to announce his undying love for me or anything, but a twinge of sadness did pinch my chest.
“So you’ve told us, more than once, I believe,” Remy replied. “One might think you’re covering up your true feelings with your overconfidence.”
“Ooooh! You got called out,” Chase jumped in.
That was great—I loved seeing how much Remy had grown and how comfortable he felt around us now.
“I thought you were the nice friend,” Josh told Remy, who shrugged.
“Nice and honest.”
“You just leave us alone so I can get my man some cranberries and go eat.” Josh looked at me and winked. Damn it, my pulse fluttered. What was this shit? Being in love was like feeling cut open and raw all the damn time. I wasn’t sure how I felt about it.
Josh pointed the cranberries out to me, and I had missed them. After adding a scoop to my plate, we sat next to each other at the table.
It was loud and messy, everyone talking with each other or in separate conversations. Logan and Charlie argued. Callum told them their plates needed to be colorful, whatever the fuck that meant. At one point, Miguel leaned over and kissed the corner of Natalie’s mouth, and I practically saw the hearts floating around her head.
Mary Beth helped Charlie get a drink, and Carol chatted about how she’d be looking for a house to rent before they moved here over the summer.
“I’m gonna rent mine out,” I said. “I’m not in a rush. I’d hold it for you.” The house was paid off, so it wouldn’t set me back to do it that way. I wanted to make sure Carol and Charlie had a place to move to.
“What?” Carol gasped. “I couldn’t ask you to do that.”
“You didn’t. I offered. It’s…weird, in a lot of ways, having someone else live in my family home. I think I need some space from it and to find something that’s more me, but I want to know it’s taken care of too. Who better than the mother of one of my best friends’ kids?”
“That’s…maybe the sweetest thing in the world. Thank you. Could we come look at it sometime?”
“Absolutely.”
“Shit, man. Thank you. That means a lot to me,” Knox said, but I waved it off. I wasn’t real big on being the center of attention.
Carol looked at Josh. “You have a good one. He’s definitely a keeper.”
“Yeah,” he replied softly. “Yeah, he’s great.”
“Aww!” Kellan and Callum said in unison. They were good at that. Sometimes it was like they planned it out.
The subject got changed from there, Chase teasing Kellan. I risked a glance at Josh, and he was just sitting there, looking at me.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
Josh
I didn’t know what was wrong with me.
I’d done well the rest of the evening at Knox’s. We ate our meal and played a game of charades. We laughed and shit-talked and joked about bad language around little ears, before Logan made sure we knew he heard worse things in the school hallways than he ever did at home.
And it was almost perfect.
Too bad I felt like a fraud the whole time.
I was quiet on the way home. Quiet as I told Griff I was taking a shower. Went about my business to get ready for him because Griffin had said earlier he wanted to fuck me at some point, and there was this gentle pulse of truth deep inside me, telling me I needed it tonight. I’d never needed to be fucked before. I’d wanted it. I’d enjoyed it. Mostly I wanted to be the one topping, but tonight I needed Griff inside me, which was likely at the crux of what was wrong.
It was getting a hell of a lot harder to deny the things I’d been trying to tell myself I didn’t feel.
Once I was finished taking care of business and showering, I wrapped a towel around my waist and went to my room.
Griff sat on the edge of the bed, still wearing his jeans but no shirt. “Is everything okay? You’re being quiet.”
“Not used to my big mouth being closed, huh?” It was stupid to make a joke right then. I could tell Griff felt the same when he rolled his eyes.
“I’m being serious.”
“I know. Sorry.” I should tell him I was in love with him, because I knew I was. That I wanted him to be mine for real. For us to wake up together every day and for him to call this house his. For us to be like Chase and Kell, or Remy and Law, or Knox and Callum. I had all these examples of good relationships all around me, but I was stuck in the damn past. How did I get out of the past?