Total pages in book: 100
Estimated words: 98992 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 495(@200wpm)___ 396(@250wpm)___ 330(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 98992 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 495(@200wpm)___ 396(@250wpm)___ 330(@300wpm)
It feels fucking liberating to act as wild as I want without having to worry about the good girl image or the scorned ex-girlfriend persona. I love every minute of just simply being free. Of just enjoying my life the way I want.
In just a few months, I’ll be this free all the time.
Ry and I can go dancing or to dinner without worrying about who might catch us. Who might spread a rumor. Who might try to taint our reputations because we couldn’t last another day without being together.
That thought along with a few others in the same spectrum are the only ones that keep me getting out of the bed in the morning while the world I’m trapped in seems to be burning in a fire of jealousy and deception.
I broke up with Blaze only to find out two days later he did cheat on me with Ava – repeatedly – and that all he did want was to tap the piece of ass “Collins couldn’t”. He got his ass jumped shortly after that information reached me. I didn’t encourage or arrange the beating, but I can’t say it didn’t put a small spiteful smile on my face.
As for the prospects after him, they’ve been mainly underclassmen who want to be seen with a “smokin’ hot” senior. Turns out most guys in my own grade, don’t want to wear the badge of shame of not living up to the perfect boyfriend Ry used to be or fall victim to the never-ending judgments for being runner up like Blaze.
Nowadays though, I have moments where I look at Ry and swear that I don’t know who he really is anymore. On our way to the movies last week, I called him out about some of the bullshit I had heard. He fessed up to smoking cigarettes and weed, but nothing else. And even when he was explaining the choices that he was making yet didn’t want to tell me about, his word choice was suspiciously specific.
I honestly don’t know if he believes he’s protecting me by keeping me away from his growing dirty secrets or doesn’t trust me to know them.
For some reason…both of those options kind of hurt.
I kill the engine to Carmen’s SUV outside of her house. “Out.”
She groans in unhappiness. “Girl, you’re so fucking bossy.”
“And you’re so fucking welcome.” I dangle the keys for her to make it into her house. “Go inside, go straight to the couch, and crash. You’ll have plenty of time to get to your bed before your parents get home.” Pulling out my own keys is done at the same instant I announce, “I’m gonna go ahead and go home.”
Her pout is immediate and overdramatic, “Bitch, stay.”
With a small giggle, I shake my head. “Nah. We’re visiting my grandparents stupid fucking early in the morning, and it’s gonna be like a family bake fest all day, so I’m just gonna crash in my own bed where I know I’ll get good sleep.”
Or at least better.
I hate sleeping in the room Ry and I used to all alone.
I usually end up crying until I pass out.
“But I’ll miss you.”
Her drunken proclamation makes me shake my head again. “You’ll be fine. You can text me the minute you rise from the dead.”
Carmen gives me the finger prior to stumbling out of her vehicle and towards her front door.
While waiting for my best friend to make it inside, I grab my vibrating phone from my purse.
Ry: Club hoppin over?
Me: Yeah. Headed home from Carmen’s now.
She fumbles with her keys for a minute before she slips inside her house. Thankful she’s safe, I get into my very own car – the best Christmas present I could ask for – and head home. Is it a shiny, expensive, new toy like everyone else I go to school with seems to have? No. But it’s paid for, and most importantly, it’s mine. It’ll do to get me around. Besides, once Ry and I have our own place in a couple years – we’ll probably live in dorms at first –, we can save up to buy me something better.
As soon as I pull the car into the driveway behind my dad’s truck, my eyes spot Ry who is parked across the street leaned against his own car. Quickly, I hop out and rush towards him, the below freezing temperature barely registering.
Around him very few things besides him do.
Thrilled at his presence, at the thoughtful surprise of his risky appearance, I toss my arms around his neck. “Hey you!”
“Hi you,” he hums back, both his jacket covered arms trapping me tightly to him.
My eyes happily shut, thankful for this Christmas miracle.
We haven’t been together in over a week.
I was beginning to wonder if we ever would be able to be alone again.