Total pages in book: 88
Estimated words: 83586 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 418(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 279(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83586 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 418(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 279(@300wpm)
Both of them looked at me like I’d lost my damn mind. “There you go lookin’ for the good in people. You and Sutton are the same that way. It’s gonna get you into trouble one of these days,” Mama said, then turned to the hostess. “We need to do something—get him outta town. We don’t need that here. Has anyone told the sheriff?”
They went on, but their voices became background noise to my thoughts, and I basically blocked them out. I’d never known a gay person in Ryland before. They had to be there, of course, but none that were out, none that people knew about. Why the hell would he come here?
When I saw movement in my periphery, I turned to find Molly walking up to us, in her Iris’s uniform. Her hand shook as she pushed a lock of her blonde bob behind her ear. “Jasper, Ms. Sherry, how are y’all this mornin’?”
“I’ll let you to it,” the hostess said, leaving us with Molly. “Have a good day.”
Molly’s face was pale, her gaze darting around like she was scared of something.
“You okay?” I asked, instead of answering her question.
“Yeah, I just… Sammy…never mind. I just need to talk to him about something, but I think he’s sleepin’ through my calls.”
“Want me to go to your place and rouse him? I can.”
“No, no,” she rushed out. “I’m fine. It’s not a big deal.”
Mama said, “Terry was just tellin’ us about that Fox gentleman. The one from up North who thinks he’s better than everyone else. Turns out he was just tryin’ to keep a secret about who he is. You stay away from him, you hear me? Sammy needs to get his mail route changed. I think that awful man is on it. I’m gonna call him.”
“I’ll take care of it!” Molly wrung her hands together, nothing but nervous energy.
I said, “It’ll be okay. Even if he’s on Sammy’s route, he’ll be safe. What reason would he have to associate with that man at all? He’s just gotta put the mail in the box and go.” I figured that had to be scary for her, knowing Sammy was going out to his place. Honestly, it made me nervous for him too. Sammy and I might not be real close, but we were family, blood, and I took care of my own.
“I know. It’s fine. Just ignore me. Y’all want coffee? Orange juice? It’s good to see you both again.” Molly tried to cover up that she was upset but didn’t do the best job. I felt bad for her. Sammy was her whole world. It was clear as day how much they loved each other.
We put in our order, and when Molly went to the kitchen, the conversation immediately went back to Emerson Fox, the gay man in Ryland who had murdered his lover. It was all anyone talked about, Mama included. I couldn’t even say how many people stopped by our table just to see if we heard the news. Every now and then, I’d hear his name from tables around us. Nothing like this had ever happened here before, and it had folks worried.
I tried to change the subject. It felt, fuck, I didn’t know, weird or wrong talking about it like this, gossiping about a dead man and another who had been found innocent.
When we got home, the first thing I did was go to Sutton’s room. I heard him playing his guitar, humming softly. The door was ajar, and I pushed it open, watching him for a second, seeing him release all this emotion from the tips of his fingers into the chords he strummed.
There was something so damn sad about him that I felt it, and it weighed down my heart. I couldn’t handle seeing Sutton this way. I didn’t know what was wrong, but he wasn’t acting right.
“Hey,” I said softly, and he startled some, before looking up and into the mirror facing the door. He could see me in it, and I him, but he stayed on the bed, not turning around. Look at me. What’s wrong? Why won’t you look at me? I silently pleaded with his reflection.
“Hey.”
“You’ll never guess what happened. That Fox guy, the one who lives outta town and don’t talk to nobody? Apparently, he’s a queer and offed his boyfriend. Went on trial and everything, but was found innocent. Folks think he paid them off, but I don’t know about that. Maybe he didn’t really do it, right? He got off and all, but damn, this kinda thing don’t happen here.” I held on to the doorjamb, waited for Sutton to reply, waited for him to acknowledge what I’d said at all.
“You shouldn’t use that word that way.”
I frowned. “What word?”
“Queer. If you don’t mean no harm, it’s okay to say someone is queer—at least from what I’ve heard or read online—but they’re not a queer, and you shouldn’t use it as a derogatory term.”