Total pages in book: 88
Estimated words: 83586 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 418(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 279(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83586 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 418(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 279(@300wpm)
So yeah, I was thinking about that a little at dinner. Sammy, his mama, and Molly were there too. Sometimes Sammy and Molly confused me. They were close as close could be, but something was off. I couldn’t put my finger on what it was, or hell, maybe I was batshit crazy and there was nothing at all.
Jasper was saying, “We’re thinkin’ about redoing the floors in the cabin. Sutton’s real good with hardwood. We never shoulda put carpet in there in the first place, but it was cheaper.” He always talked about the cabin like it was both of ours. And yeah, I lived with him, but it wasn’t mine. “Now that I got a little money put back, I think we might do it ourselves,” Jasper said while we were all shoveling food into our mouths. No one could cook as well as Sherry. I loved her food.
“You guys are getting too old to live like a couple of bachelors,” Bob said, making the hairs on the back of my neck rise and guilt fill my belly with discomfort. He was the kind of man who didn’t have a lot to say most of the time, but when he spoke, people listened. “What you need to do is stop depending on each other so much. Find yourself a wife, Jasper, and then she can help you figure out what you want to do with the cabin.”
I didn’t look up when they spoke, couldn’t, just took another bite like they weren’t talking about me. Bob was right. That was what should happen, what would happen one day.
“They’re best friends,” Sherry replied. “They’re still young. There’s no reason for either of them to rush into a family. Jasper and Caroline broke up just a few months back. She was horrible for him. We don’t need a girl like that in the family. The right one will come along.” Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her reach over and squeeze Jasper’s hand.
I needed to say something, needed to hammer home that she was right and remind myself what I needed to do, what I would do. “Don’t plan on livin’ with him forever,” I said.
The heat of Jasper’s stare made fire lick up my skin, made me shift uncomfortably in my seat. Why did that surprise him? Why did it upset him? Because I knew it did. He confused me so fucking much sometimes, like maybe he had some of the same thoughts I did.
“Well,” Sherry said, “when you find someone, make sure she’s like our Molly here. From what I hear, you’re hardly ever home anymore, Sammy. Even when Molly’s at work, you’re at her place.”
I breathed out a sigh of relief, knowing the conversation had shifted away from us.
They talked about Sammy and Molly for a while. Sherry gave Sammy’s mama a hard time about her rarely coming over lately. Their family was strange. They were all really close. All Sherry and Bob talked about was the importance of kin, but then Carrie was often on the outskirts, and Sammy too. I thought maybe I got Carrie some, though. There was a lot of pressure from Jasper’s parents. Carrie kept to herself, especially after one of her incidents in town, and it wasn’t too long ago that the rumor mill had been going crazy about her being so drunk, they had to call Sammy Joe to get her from the bar.
We finished dinner and had dessert. When the company left, Jasp and I decided to go home too. Sherry pulled me into a hug and said, “You too, you know?”
“Me too, what?”
“We’ll be excited when you bring home a nice girl too. You’re part of this family, Sutton Manning. I always want to make sure you know that.”
Would you still feel that way if you knew what I keep buried deep?
“Yes, ma’am. I know.”
“We love you. And your mama and daddy, they would be so proud.” She kissed my cheek, and I thanked her, throat thick with emotion. She hugged Jasper next, and then we were on our way.
We were halfway to Jasper’s house when he asked, “You okay?”
“Yeah, my stomach is a bit off for some reason,” I lied.
“Want me to make you somethin’ when we get home? Or I can start you a bath or—”
“I can start my own fucking bath, Jasper. Jesus,” I snapped, my words bitter and sad, disguised by anger.
“Fine. Whatever. I was just tryin’ to be nice. Don’t know why you suddenly have a burr in your saddle.”
Fuck. I was being an asshole. It was just so damn hard when he said things like that, did things like that. It blurred the already fuzzy line in our relationship, at least for me. “Sorry. Just not feelin’ so hot, is all. Didn’t mean to be a dick.”