Total pages in book: 95
Estimated words: 91864 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 459(@200wpm)___ 367(@250wpm)___ 306(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 91864 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 459(@200wpm)___ 367(@250wpm)___ 306(@300wpm)
When I was able to open my eyes again, I continued. “I don’t even know how I pulled the fucking trigger but I did. The dart flew into the front seat. It startled him. His head whipped around to see what it was, and when he wasn’t looking, the other driver swerved into our lane and hit us head-on. They died. I was fine.”
And my grandmother got me. My dad took her daughter away, and then my dad and I both took her away for good.
“Fuck, Ethan. That wasn’t your fault, baby.”
“What happened to Straighty?”
“We might have just graduated. At least sometimes. You’ll always be Straighty to me.” But then his eyes got serious. His lips turned down at the corners and I saw the pain on his face. My pain. He was hurting for me. “It wasn’t your fault,” he said again.
“Wasn’t it, though? I mean, yes, it was an accident, but I still caused it.”
“You said the other driver was drunk. Did you make that up?”
I shook my head. “No. His blood alcohol level was double the limit. It’s why he drifted into our lane, but if I hadn’t distracted my dad, he could have avoided it. He could have swerved the opposite way.” I wasn’t stupid. I knew technically, I hadn’t caused the wreck. It was a combination of bad luck—the gun, and the other driver who hadn’t been paying attention either.
“I’m sorry,” he said again. “I’m glad you told me, but I wish you had told me sooner.”
“You’re the only person I’ve ever told that to.”
“You really must like me a lot.” He grinned, then leaned in and whispered against my lips, “It’s not your fault.” And then, “Have you ever tried to talk to her about everything? Your grandmother?”
I shook my head.
That was enough for tonight. I took his mouth then, and he gave it. I rolled us over so Sean was on his back. And when I took him, raw like we were able to do now after getting checked, I thought maybe this feeling thing wasn’t so bad…as long as I got to do it with him.
I rubbed my eyes, which stung due to lack of sleep. I guessed that was what happened when I stayed up thinking half the night and then spilling my guts to Sean.
“You look like old Ethan,” Sadie said as we stood in the conference room. Owen was beside her.
“Old Ethan?” I questioned.
“The one who stayed up all night working or with a random woman and looks like he could use a little more sleep.”
“Oh, and I haven’t been like that lately? I assure you, I’m getting sex every night.”
“You’ve definitely been different…happy,” Owen said, surprising me. He worked for me, but I didn’t know him very well. The only person I let myself get truly close to at work was Sadie. Still, I liked Owen. Hell, if it wasn’t for his birthday, I wouldn’t have Sean.
“I’ve always been happy,” I told him.
“Okay,” he replied, but I could tell he didn’t believe me.
“It’s different,” Sadie added. “You’re not working nearly as much. You’re not boasting about all your conquests. If I didn’t know better, I’d think you’d fallen in love with a woman.”
Both she and Owen chuckled like it was the funniest possibility in the world.
“You both work for me. You better remember that.” I eyed them teasingly. “And I’m not in love.” I couldn’t be.…Could I? No. That took longer than a couple of months. It had to.
“But you are seeing someone?” Sadie asked. “You didn’t deny that. Who is she?”
“Mind your own business,” I replied. It felt wrong though because they automatically assumed Sean was a woman. I felt as though I was being dishonest to us by not correcting them.
Before I could speak, one of the office secretaries approached me. “Mr. Harris. There’s a Sean Wright here to see you. He says he’s here to take you to lunch.”
I smiled. We didn’t have a lunch date, but I was glad he’d come.
“Holy shit,” Owen said.
“It’s a guy?” Sadie asked.
I winked at them, and as I walked away, I heard Owen add, “No fair. If I knew he went both ways, I would’ve tried to get a piece of that months ago.”
It was too late now.
28
Sean
We sat in an eatery not far from Ethan’s office.
I’d debated about bothering him at work, but I couldn’t help myself.
Ethan ate a bacon double cheeseburger while I shoved a slice of pepperoni pizza into my mouth.
As I chewed, Ethan swallowed some of his burger and said, “Just couldn’t last a whole day without seeing me?” He beamed, his expression filled with an “I’m so proud of myself” look. “But you can just admit you want me to try that move I did on you this morning again.”
My face filled with heat just at the thought of a particularly satisfying experience we’d shared before we parted for work, when Ethan decided to show me some of the moves he’d picked up in porn. “I have to say, since you started this whole gay sex thing, you’ve certainly worked really fucking hard to master it.”