The Problem With Pretending Read Online Emma Hart

Categories Genre: Contemporary, Funny Tags Authors:
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Total pages in book: 128
Estimated words: 126850 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 634(@200wpm)___ 507(@250wpm)___ 423(@300wpm)
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“Do you have to put it like that?” Gabriella asked.

“Yes. It’s my boobs being milked. I can put it any way I like.”

Adelaide rolled her eyes. “That’s enough about Eva’s milk factory. Grace, I have to know how you ended up here. The last we knew, you were shunning everything and going off-the-grid.”

“That’s a bit dramatic, even for you,” I retorted. “I’m doing my PhD. I don’t have a lot of time for random stuff, and any excuse I have to avoid Carmen is one I will most certainly take advantage of.”

“Have you spoken to her tonight?” Gabriella sipped her wine.

“Nope. I’m quite proud of that. And probably owe Vincent a hundred quid for keeping her away from me.”

Eva snorted. “Yes, but how did you end up here at the wedding? We all know you’re not actually seeing Will.”

“It’s complicated,” I said, but went on to explain just how I’d ended up here anyway. There was a lot of giggling and ooh-ing and ahh-ing as the whole story tumbled out of me, and I finished on a sigh. “Now I don’t know what to do.”

“Been there,” Eva muttered. “That’s how I’ve ended up a walking milk farm.”

“Shh,” I said, miming zipping her lips. “We’re not cursing that, thank you very much.”

Adelaide leant to the side and looked across the room. “As far as marriage options go, he’s not bad.”

“Not bad? Have you seen this castle?” Gabriella asked. “I’d marry him for this castle.”

“No, you wouldn’t,” Addy said. “I wouldn’t let you after all the drama of you and Miles sneaking around.”

“We did not sneak around.”

“You were sneaking around,” Eva said, then looked at me. “Grace, it’s been twenty years. William is not your father, and you are not your mother. If you like him, there’s no harm in giving it a chance. The worst that could happen is what you already expect, and the best is that you could marry him and one day take societal precedence over your stepmother.”

“You shouldn’t marry out of spite,” Addy muttered.

“No, you should marry for love,” Eva agreed. “But spite is an excellent secondary reason.”

Gabi nodded her head. “She’s right, you know.”

I sighed. “I know. It’s just… every time I think about changing my mind, something tells me not to.”

“That’s called fear.” Eva fiddled with her earring. “And take it from me—fake relationships just don’t work, Grace. Unless you’re wildly incompatible with the other person, you’re setting yourself up for failure, and I’m sorry to say that’s what the two of you have done.”

I knew that.

“You shouldn’t let the past dictate your future. Other people’s choices and actions, especially ones you had no control over, should not impact yours today.”

“That was beautiful,” Addy said. “Did you get that off Pinterest during a night feed?”

We all burst into a round of giggles, and Gabriella wrapped her arm around my shoulders, giving me a quick hug.

“You’ll figure it out,” she said into my ear. “Sooner or later.”

I smiled, looking down. “I hope so.”

“What are we figuring out?” Alexander, the Duke of Worcester, slid up behind Adelaide and leant against her chair. “It looked rather like you were planning on how to take over the world.”

“Only the country,” I answered with a smile.

“I suggested elephants,” Eva offered. “They’re big, they’re strong, and nobody is going to take down an elephant.”

“I don’t know,” Matthew, the Earl of Anglesey, said, appearing next to her. “I suppose it would depend how many people you trample on.”

“Nobody. It would be a peaceful protest.”

“Can you have a peaceful protest with elephants?” Alex asked.

“Moreso than if you rode in on hungry lions,” I quipped.

Gabriella snapped her fingers. “Although that would be an appropriate animal to seize control of England with.”

“That, or dragons.”

Matthew nodded slowly. “I vote for the dragons.”

“You would. You’re Welsh,” Eva replied. “If you’re getting dragons, then William needs to ride in on a unicorn to represent Scotland.”

“Where would one find a unicorn?” he asked, resting on the back of my chair. “Could we just strap an ice-cream cone to a horse’s head?”

I tilted my head back to look up at him. “Why would you strap an ice-cream cone to a horse’s head?”

“To make it a unicorn, obviously.”

“What if it rains?”

“I’ll take a whole box.”

“That’s a ridiculous plan.”

“So are the elephants. Where are you going to get that many elephants to overthrow the government?”

“We can use goats,” Gabi said, twirling her hair around her finger. “Aunt Cat has about thirty now, and we can just release them in Westminster. Cause chaos there instead of at Arrowwood Hall.”

“Please,” Miles muttered. “I’m sick of mending their fences.”

I grinned. “I do not miss the chaos of a large estate, I have to be honest. Although if Granny thought she could keep goats at her allotment, she absolutely would.”

“That seems like a dangerous idea to put into her head,” William said slowly. “Given that she’s already discussing how many parrots she’s going to buy when she gets home.”


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