Silent Chaos (Love and Lyrics #2) Read Online Nikki Ash

Categories Genre: Angst, Contemporary Tags Authors: Series: Love and Lyrics Series by Nikki Ash
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Total pages in book: 82
Estimated words: 78016 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 390(@200wpm)___ 312(@250wpm)___ 260(@300wpm)
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She sighs and shakes her head. “I think he resented that I was making more money than him. Anyway, after I told him I wanted to take the job, he agreed to move to LA, giving up his chance at making partner. And for a while, things were good. He found a law firm to work at, and I thought we were happy.

“And then one day I came home and found him with the nanny. I lost it. Told him I was going to file for divorce. I kicked him out and told him we were done.”

What the fuck? Nothing she’s saying makes any sense. This is nothing like what my dad has told me over the years.

“I had a friend of mine pick you up from school while I was looking for a new nanny, but when she got there, she was told you were already picked up. Your dad had taken you back to New York. Because I was contracted to finish the movie, I couldn’t go after you, and before I could file for divorce, your dad filed first, claiming I abandoned you and was an unfit parent.”

Fresh tears spill from her lids, and just as I’m about to reach for her and comfort her, she says the words that have me stopping in my tracks.

“I let him have you.” Her admission causes my heart to drop. I always knew she walked away, but her confirming it makes it feel real.

“You gave me up without a fight?”

She sniffs. “I did it for you. A long-drawn-out custody battle wouldn’t have been good for you. I was young, and your dad was a lawyer—a damn good one. I met with an attorney, and he told me the chances of me winning were slim.”

“And I wasn’t worth it to you to fight for...”

“No,” she gasps. “I regretted it every day. I asked him several times to reconsider, but he was so mad. He said he cheated because I was never home. He blamed me. He was so angry and wouldn’t let me near you.”

“So instead of trying to fight for me, for your kid you gave birth to, who you were supposed to love and raise and protect and mother, you walked away and started a new family.”

I stand, not wanting to hear another word. “Glad we got the facts straight.”

“I never stopped thinking about you,” she cries. “I just... I didn’t know how to fix it. I missed you every day. I had planned to come to you once you turned eighteen, and then your band hit it big, and I’ll admit, I was too scared. I thought you would think I was only coming to you because your band was successful.”

“You seem to have excuses for everything,” I say dryly. “You claim to have loved me, but it wasn’t enough to fight for me. You missed me, but it wasn’t enough to seek me out. You said you walked away for me. Well, I claim bullshit. You did it for you. Because you were scared and weak, and you didn’t love me enough.”

“Braxton, please,” she pleads, but I raise my hand. I’m done. Just fucking done.

Without another word or sparing her another glance, I walk away from her, the same way she walked away from me all those years ago.

I’m back in my room, one bottle emptied, another half gone, when there’s a knock on my door, followed by Kaylee begging me to let her in.

Knowing her ass isn’t going to stop until I open the door, I stumble over to it, unlocking and opening it.

“Finally... I—”

“I said I needed space earlier, and I meant it.”

“That was before your mom—”

“Doesn’t change shit,” I slur. “I need fucking space.”

Her face falls, and I almost feel bad. “What does that mean?”

“That means what I said. I need time... space to figure my shit out.”

“Let me be here for you, please.” She places her soft hand on my arm, and I catch a glimpse of the tattoo she got when we were together.

“You said forever...”

“Huh?”

I grab her hand and twist it so she can see the ink. “You said forever, but the second shit got rough, you lied and pushed me away. Just like my mom did.”

“That’s not the same thing.”

“Really? How is it any different? She walked away... for me. You pushed me away... for me. You both promised forever, and as soon as the first bump in the road hit, you forgot the promises you made.”

“Braxton...”

“I don’t wanna hear it. I’ve heard enough fucking excuses for one day. What I want is to be by myself and drink until I’m so drunk I forget about today.”

Before she can argue, I slam the door in her face and head back onto the balcony, where I do exactly what I said—drink until I’m so drunk I can’t remember anything but the porcelain toilet I spend half the night throwing up in.


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