Total pages in book: 121
Estimated words: 112755 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 564(@200wpm)___ 451(@250wpm)___ 376(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 112755 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 564(@200wpm)___ 451(@250wpm)___ 376(@300wpm)
“It is bullshit, and our justice system is screwed up, Legend. It protects the criminals more than the sufferers and survivors. That’s another reason why I talk to kids. It’s my duty. I’m a soldier for these kids, you hear me?” She sounded so powerful. So on top of her shit and in the know. He had a respect for her he couldn’t put into words. He’d go as far as to call her his hero. “You got one thing wrong though. I’m not a victim, Legend. I’m just Desiree.” She shrugged. “Livin’ my life, and livin’ my life well, is the best revenge. So, that’s what I’m doing. I still struggle sometimes. I have problems with men and trust issues. You’ve seen it. You’ve called me out on it. We’ve been makin’ jokes about it, but those songs I listen to help me feel okay, because deep down, I want to experience love. True love, with someone who isn’t out to use me, hurt me, or get over.”
I can love you the way you want to be loved, baby. Just give me a chance…
“I hear you. Now look at you, taking care of business. You’re a bad bitch, and I mean that in the most respectful way.”
“Legend, you need yo’ ass beat.” He burst out laughing. “Normally, I would cuss a man out who said that to me, but I know you don’t mean nothin’ by it!” They both cracked up. “You’re damn right though, and relationships have been the farthest from my mind, but I’m not gonna even hold you.” She smiled sadly. “If the right man walked into my life, I’d jump at the chance of something great with him, but he’d have to be a good person for my daughter, too. I can’t just think about me anymore. I gotta think about my baby.”
“I understand.”
“I don’t mind datin’ a guy that fell down, as long as he got up, and did everything in his power to stay up. Nobody’s perfect. I’m not workin’ on no build-a-bears over here.” He laughed at that. “I’m serious. I have enough on my plate without having to babysit a whole grown man. I went to college and got an associate degree in business right after I had my baby. I then started working, saving up money. Now, years later, I’m in cooking school so I can run a restaurant. I’ve got my child in a good charter school, and I’m pretty much raising her on my own, because her father has his own problems that ain’t even worth talking about right now.”
“Can I ask you something?”
“Boy, you know you can. We’ve done told all of each other’s business these past few weeks. I guess that means we feel safe with one another, and we both had a lot to say. See? I told you that you’d be a good friend. You’re a good listener.”
Friend? Stop calling me a fucking friend. I want to fuck you. Be deep inside you. I want to love on you. Take you and your daughter out to the zoo and shit. Like a real couple. I want to be with you! I FEEL DEEPLY ABOUT YOU.
“Yeah… okay.” He closed his eyes for a spell, trying to gain his composure.
“So, go ahead and ask me your question. No sense in me getting quiet all of a sudden in the last inning.”
He smiled at that.
“Where’s your father at now? After everything that happened?”
“Oh, he’s dead, baby.” She smirked, happily relaying the information. “Died in prison. He was in and out of jail for other shit. Larceny. Domestic violence against other women. He’s been gone for a long while now. About twelve years.”
“He should rot in hell.”
The words just slipped out of his mouth again. He was having issues controlling himself tonight, and he wasn’t sure why.
They stared at one another, suspended in time. Something was happening—a new aspect of their relationship forming. One designed from pain. They were bonding through emotional evolution and admiration—sealed with lust and desire.
“I say hell is too good for him, but I’m sure that’s where he is. I wasn’t his only victim, and neither was my sister. This was his lifestyle. Sick ass fucker.” She shook her head in disgust. “People talking about you have to forgive in order to move on. No, the hell I don’t!” She laughed loudly. “I don’t forgive that demon, and I never will, but I don’t let the thoughts of him and what he did to me consume me, either. He don’t deserve my time or the mental headspace. See, that’s the key.”
She reached for her toes, and began to rub on them, massaging them. The movement tickled his legs a little. “I think that’s almost a form of brainwashing when people tell other folks that we have to forgive someone that basically tried to snuff out our very soul. That’s wrong. That’s a form of gaslighting.”