Total pages in book: 119
Estimated words: 115860 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 579(@200wpm)___ 463(@250wpm)___ 386(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 115860 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 579(@200wpm)___ 463(@250wpm)___ 386(@300wpm)
My brother saves me from untangling that mystery by rasping out, “What have I done?”
Then he promptly melts into unconsciousness.
Chapter
Fifty-Eight
It isn’t long before Lucan levers himself up to sit on the edge of the bed. He cradles his head in his hands, staring at Anka in horror. He’s alive and lucid…but he looks utterly broken.
If I needed more proof of magic’s capricious, destructive nature, I’ve got it, right before my eyes.
I don’t ask if my brother is all right. Such a trite, ridiculous question. I know the answer. How does a man face the stunning twist of fate magic forced him to suffer today, nearly strangling his beloved wife?
Suddenly, Sabelle bursts into Lucan’s bedroom, Bram, Duke, and Ice hot on her heels.
They take in the scene, staring at Anka, who’s pale as death and looks beyond defeated. Since she is the source of Lucan’s pain, she alone could perform the helbresele spell to heal Lucan’s mate mourning. She used every ounce of her strength to do it, bravely depleting her energy and fighting certain death at his hands.
Now, she’s half dead.
Desperately, Lucan curls his body protectively over Anka’s, chanting his apology against her lips over and over. He clings to her, sharing his energy through simple touches. Slowly but surely, it provides her a small boost.
Finally, she opens her eyes, but her gaze bypasses my brother and goes straight to Bram. “I need Shock.”
Of all the things she could say in that moment…
Lucan staggers back, aghast, skewered by agony and the ache of betrayal. “That’s why you smell like him. You’ve…been with him.”
Anka’s amber eyes well up with tears, and the terrible truth is obvious before she speaks a word.
“I didn’t remember you,” she implores. “I first went to the town where I grew up because I remembered an aunt from my childhood—a witch. But everyone magical was gone. I hadn’t been home in decades, so I didn’t recognize anyone, but some humans mentioned that Aquarius visits her aunt’s grave from time to time. They told me she lives in London. So I went to stay with her, hoping Mathias would never think to look for me there. Thankfully, she knew who I was and filled in quite a few of my memory gaps, because I remembered almost nothing about myself or my life beyond bits of my childhood.”
I go to my brother’s side and brace my hand on Lucan’s shoulder in silent support. I want to be furious with Anka for hurting him, for putting him through so much, and now for betraying him with his greatest enemy. But her sweet face and bowed mouth crumble into pain and anguish.
She’s clearly been through every bit of Lucan’s tragedy and more. And she was brutalized repeatedly…
“But you remembered Shock,” Lucan spits out. “Before you recalled me, the mate you spent a century with.”
Fresh tears fall down Anka’s pale cheeks. “After Mathias broke our bond, I remembered nothing. I suspected I was once mated, but I was weak and needed energy. I remembered Shock’s Call.”
Lucan looks away, jaw clenched in anguish. My brother picturing his wife and his enemy embracing, sharing pleasure, must be one of the most agonizing visions. I hurt for Lucan. Imagining Sydney with another man is like an open wound in my gut.
No one else in the room says a word.
Drawing a few deep breaths, Lucan finally turns back to his former mate. “You remember me now. Come home.”
“I’m not the same woman,” the exhausted witch says sadly.
“You don’t need Shock. You have me.”
Anka gathers her strength and grasps Lucan’s hand. “I do need him. Everything between you and me is a treasured memory. But I need time… I can’t simply step back into my old life as if nothing has changed when everything has.”
“Because I failed to protect you?”
She barely manages to shake her head as tears threaten to overtake her. “What Mathias did changed me. I can’t just…pretend he didn’t strip away every ounce of who I am as a human being, as a woman. I don’t know who I am anymore. I don’t know what I want or what to believe…”
“We’ll find out together. I’ll help you.” He squeezes her hands tight. “I’ll heal you.”
“I don’t deserve you. You don’t know what I did with Mathias,” she chokes as she squeezes her eyes shut in shame.
“Against your will!”
“In the beginning, yes. Absolutely. But then…” Tears stream down her ashen face. “I begged him.”
Her words feel like a death blow. Lucan swallows. “He compelled you. Don’t think for a second that I fault you. I left you unprotected, and Mathias abducted you. I love you—”
She withdraws from his grasp. “Don’t. I came as soon as I remembered you. I’m so sorry for the way our mating ended. I had to make certain you weren’t suffering.”
“Without you? Every day. I have no one to blame but myself for”—Lucan stumbles on his words—“for Mathias violating you.”