Total pages in book: 102
Estimated words: 98487 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 492(@200wpm)___ 394(@250wpm)___ 328(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 98487 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 492(@200wpm)___ 394(@250wpm)___ 328(@300wpm)
If I’m honest, I feel like I’m good enough to sleep with, but not to know. Maybe I need to change my way of thinking? Maybe I’m too old for school, but I don’t feel like I am. I’m basically the same age as everyone else. I don’t want to be on dating sites or going to bars or parties to meet people. I just think, when it’s time, she’ll appear out of the blue, and it’ll be different.
Or maybe this week seems off because I’m overly stimulated by everything. Between the hockey house, the gymnastics team, and trying to figure out if I want to change my major, it’s been a lot. I’m not complaining; I’m excited for all the different opportunities.
But along with everything else, the attention is making me self-conscious. Before, I wouldn’t care who was watching me when I ran, but I’m hyperaware of it now. Even in class, I feel like I can’t relax because I’m being watched. I notice girls talking and asking who I am. I’ve been asked out in person—and through my DMs on Instagram—hourly. The only place I don’t get hit on is in the hockey house, and that’s because I’m the RA.
Of course, when I confide in my brother about my issues, Owen thinks I’m an absolute idiot for not loving all the attention and capitalizing on it. Ah, if only I could be like him. No cares in the world and walking around like a stud. It’s always been like that; it was always Owen and Evan. Never Evan and Owen. I played in his shadow, and I didn’t cause issues. Now, away from him, I don’t know how to handle it all.
I run a little harder, unhappy with where my mind is wandering. I wish I didn’t do this to myself, just completely tear myself down when I’m doing my best. Is it Owen’s best? Fuck no. But it’s my best, and I shouldn’t be feeling sorry for myself. I should be proud. I’m out here, and I’m living, instead of hiding and wishing it all would go away.
As I round the corner and head to the quad, I notice a runner in front of me. I’m not proud to admit this, but I’ve been staring at the ass of that girl for the last couple days, so I know exactly who it is. I run a little faster to catch up with her. While the gymnastics practices have given me anxiety from all those girls ruthlessly flirting with me, I have to admit, Callie has been my saving grace. She’s a breath of fresh air, and damn, she’s pretty. We chitchat a lot, and I always find myself near the event she is at in the gym…so I can move a mat. She intrigues me.
As I catch up, she looks over, and her eyes fill with surprise before she smiles widely at me. I take my AirPod out as she does the same. “Why’re you running?”
“For fitness?” she teases, slowing her pace. “And to eat food. I like food.”
I nod. “Same, but I thought you had conditioning this morning?”
“I slept in,” she admits. “I was up late on the phone with my sister and dad-guy. He was helping me with math.”
“Explain dad-guy,” I say, out of breath.
“He’s my sister’s husband, but I call him my dad since he is absolutely awesome.”
“Your brother-in-law, then.”
She shakes her head. “He needs a better title, which is why I go with dad-guy.”
I smile. It’s nice that she loves him that much to say that, but I wonder where her real dad is. While we joke and talk during practice, I don’t think that gives me access to those details yet. “How much longer you have?”
“About twenty. You?”
“Ten, but I’ll finish with you.”
She gives me a half grin before hooking her thumb behind her. “Maybe we can lose your fan club?”
I don’t look behind me. I don’t even want to know who is back there. “Might have to pick up the pace.”
“I can do that,” she says, taking in a deep breath. “Have you seen Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire?”
I cock my head. What in the hell does that have to do with running or the fan club, as she calls them? “Of course I have.”
She nods, breathing heavy. “They remind me of the part when Viktor Krum was on the beach working out and they followed him around.” She snorts with laughter. “You’re the Bellevue version of Viktor Krum.”
She doesn’t even wait for my reaction; she pops her AirPod back in and takes off, laughing. I shake my head and do the same, running beside her. It’s hard not to take her in as we run. But I know if I do, I’ll end up falling on my face. She’s highly athletic—and fast. I think my favorite thing to watch her do is vault. It’s insane how fast she goes. Coach has nicknamed her “thunderbolt,” and it’s no joke. She’s quick and dynamic. Also, I enjoy watching her ass as she runs. She has a great ass. I know that is wrong of me; I’m supposed to be professional, but it’s really hard when it comes to Callie.