Total pages in book: 83
Estimated words: 79197 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 396(@200wpm)___ 317(@250wpm)___ 264(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 79197 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 396(@200wpm)___ 317(@250wpm)___ 264(@300wpm)
All seven of them seemed to lean in, their brows lifted in anticipation of what I was going to say next.
“To what, dear?” Cara asked. One perfectly shaped brow up in an arch.
“Start over,” I finished.
I instantly regretted my choice of words, but something about being in a church, in a women’s church circle, with seven ladies staring at me, forced me to tell the truth. Silence filled the room as they all kept their gazes on me.
“I guess…that’s it,” I finished after a long pause.
Patty jumped up. “Okay, God has not spoken yet to Emma to take a seat on the mat. Who’s going to start us off today?”
Shannon stood and made her way to the mat as I sat back in my chair. She dropped down and offered a smile that was clearly forced. Then it faded and she burst into tears.
My hand covered my mouth to hide my gasp of shock.
“My kids are driving me crazy! I was only gone for two minutes. Two. Minutes. I had to go to the bathroom. It wasn’t even number two. It was a pee. By the time I got back to the kitchen, Bailey had taken all the flour and dumped it on the kitchen floor. Little Belle was pouring the freshly made hummingbird nectar into the flour. Two minutes was all I was gone for. That was it. I nearly lost my sh— Well…you know.”
“Your shit,” Tammy said as all the other women gave her a scornful look. “What? It’s the circle, everything is safe in here. She nearly lost her shit. Call it what it is.”
Shannon pointed to Tammy. “Yes. I nearly lost my shit!” she cried out.
Patty approached her and crouched and wrapped her arm around Shannon. “I’ve been there, honey. Some women have yet to experience the joys of their kids nearly driving them mad, but just know you’re not the only mom who’s lost her…”
“Shit,” Tammy and Shannon said in unison as Patty rolled her eyes.
I covered my mouth yet again, this time to keep from laughing.
Shannon nodded. “I know. I know. In that moment, I really wanted to just pack a bag and leave. Does that make me a bad mom?”
Cries of “No!” came from all around the circle, as every woman answered at once. Myself, included.
Cara nodded and said, “Girl, that makes you human. When I caught my daughter flushing all my jewelry down the toilet, I thought I might put her up for sale to the highest bidder. I actually wrote out the advertisement and everything.”
My eyes widened in shock.
“That makes me feel better…thanks, Cara,” Shannon said, standing and making her way back over to her chair.
Rose got up and took a seat on the mat. The entire room went quiet.
“I signed the papers on Friday. It’s final.”
Three of the women got up and placed their hands on Rose. Erin was one of them. When she started to pray over Rose, a lump formed in my throat.
“Dear God, thank you for giving Rose the strength she needed to leave that bastard of a husband.”
“Erin!” Patty chastised. “I’m pretty sure the Lord doesn’t want you swearing in prayer.”
Erin gave an apologetic shrug but kept going. “Thank you for giving her the strength to leave that low-life, dirty-rotten, good-for-nothing piece of pond scum.”
Patty sighed. Meanwhile, I couldn’t take my eyes off of the women. They all had their heads bowed; their eyes closed.
Except for Rose. She was staring at me. Our eyes met and locked as Erin kept praying.
“Lord, we know it took a lot of courage for Rose to do what she did. Thank you for being the guiding hand that led her to make the decision she made for her safety and that of her daughter. Her strength is through you, Heavenly Father.”
Amens filled the room as Rose continued to stare straight into what felt like my soul. My entire body began to shake, and the idea that she knew my secret made me feel like I couldn’t breathe.
Landy added to the prayer. “Lord, also please lay your hands upon this poor woman and teach her how to cook. She nearly killed me with undercooked pork two days ago. I’m still feeling the effects.”
The anxiety attack I felt coming on disappeared just like that as I fought to keep from laughing, but I needn’t have bothered. The prayer was over and laughter from the others filled the room. I pulled my gaze from Rose and looked at Tammy. She was smiling, but when she looked at me, she did a double take and grabbed my hand.
“Are you okay, Emma? You’re white as a ghost.”
All the years of secrets I’d kept, lies I’d told, rushed through my head as I took a deep breath. “Of course. I think I’m just hot. This sweater was a poor choice.”