Total pages in book: 148
Estimated words: 135517 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 678(@200wpm)___ 542(@250wpm)___ 452(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 135517 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 678(@200wpm)___ 542(@250wpm)___ 452(@300wpm)
“Did you really think it was gonna be this easy? That you were just gonna walk back into my life fuck me and then go back to the way things were? You’re very sorely mistaken. Get out of here.” I’m not going anywhere, but I’ll hear her out. She seems to have forgotten that I like nothing more than fucking her out of one of her snits.
“Elena, calm down.” I kept my voice low and nonthreatening but made no move to leave her bed.
“Don’t you dare talk to me as if I’m having a mental breakdown? I’m very clear about what’s going on. Right now, I need you to leave. If you don’t leave, Ryder, this will be the end of us.”
“No!”
“No? What do you mean no?” When she started looking around in a huff, I knew she was looking for something to hit me with. That temper of hers still hasn’t gotten any better. I knew, though, that she needed time. Something I wouldn’t have understood before, but since I was trying to be a better man for her, I thought it prudent to give in, just this once.
“I’ll leave your bed, but I won’t leave you here in this house alone, not knowing what I know now. I can’t leave you here on your own.”
“Fine, I’ll hire security or something, but I don’t want you here.”
Could’ve fooled me. She damn near drained me with her greedy ass, and now she’s kicking me out of her bed. I didn’t say that out loud because she really would hurt me, and I didn’t mention how hot she was when she was mad for the same reason.
“No way. I walked away from you once. I will never do that again. And another thing, no one will protect you like I can. I need a shower anyway; go back to sleep.” Crazy ass woman.
She threw a few more insults at my head as I left the bed and headed for the en suite bathroom, hiding my smile of victory before she did me bodily harm. She forgets how well I know her, and I know her reaction was out of fear. Fear of me hurting her again, something I have no intention of ever doing again.
But there was something else I knew. Elena only acts like this when she cares deeply. If she really wanted me gone, she would never have let me see her vulnerability, she’d have been cold and detached, and I’d have felt lower than a roach when she was done with me.
The smile disappeared as soon as I entered the bathroom and turned the shower on. The day’s events came down on me hard, and I was finally able to breathe. All at once, everything came crashing down on me, not just the last five years but these past few months when I was fighting so hard to get back to her.
I went into the shower and cried bitter tears of regret. Tears I’d been holding in for way too long but was afraid to give in because I knew they wouldn’t stop once they started. I cried for us, and what we’d lost and for the pain I’d caused her.
I cried for the innocence I’d stolen from her and for the girl she used to be. I cried for the life we should’ve had together, but mostly I cried for the pain I’d caused her because of my own ignorance. I cried hard enough to leave the old me behind on her shower floor in my tears, just letting it all flow out of me, making room for the man I was becoming.
I didn’t feel the first bite of pain when my hand connected with the marble wall the first time or when the blood flowed from my torn flesh to mix with the water’s warmth. That, too, was my way of releasing the pain of the past, and when I dunked my head under the water’s flow, it was to wash away the last dregs of a past I never want to revisit.
By the time I turned the water off, I’d cried the old me out of my system. I’ll give her all the time she needs to work her anger and resentment out of her system, but I’m never leaving her again.
Chapter 47
*Elena*
Shit, shit, shit, what the hell have I done? How could I be so stupid?
In all my daydreams, I never imagined things turning out this way. Killing him on sight, yeah, but not once did I ever imagine jumping into bed with him the first chance I got. I wish I was the kind of woman who’d see this as getting some of my own back.
I don’t know all the particulars of their divorce, but I’m almost certain that something sinister is going on or that nut would’ve been all over the news having killed someone, either him or me.