Total pages in book: 75
Estimated words: 71915 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 360(@200wpm)___ 288(@250wpm)___ 240(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 71915 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 360(@200wpm)___ 288(@250wpm)___ 240(@300wpm)
“Got the munchies?” I teased because that was a telltale sign with him after spending a night at the Stormer House.
He smirked. “Something like that.”
I toed out of my sneakers, then plopped down beside him, feeling exhausted all of a sudden. I hadn’t been sleeping well, and it was beginning to catch up with me.
When he offered me the bag, I passed. I wasn’t much of a snacker, and Mom always joked that it would help me in the long run. She was probably referring to how some men got beer guts later in life. But Dad had remained pretty lean up to this point, so maybe I’d inherit that trait. And hopefully not the others. Obviously, I knew myself well enough by now, and Alex was right—I’d be loyal to a fault. But to be that vulnerable in front of anybody scared the shit out of me.
“What’s your problem lately?” Derek asked, breaking me out of my thoughts.
“Huh?” I set my foot on the coffee table. “What do you mean?”
“You’ve been weird,” he replied before stuffing more chips in his mouth.
I frowned. “Weird how?”
Was it that obvious that I was silently suffering?
“No desire to hang out with me, no visits from Alex… Not that I’m complaining because it’s been nice not hearing you bone him.”
“Shut up.” My skin heated as I thought about how good that felt. Not only the sex but having him in my bed and feeling his warm skin next to mine. I could still smell him in my sheets, which was probably gross, but I didn’t care.
“C’mon, seriously.” Derek’s expression grew somber. “Is it over or something?”
“Maybe.” I leaned my head against the cushion behind me and stared at the ceiling.
“Did he ditch your ass?” He elbowed me. “That would explain all the brooding.”
“Please. Have you forgotten about your emo self in high school?” I waved my hand. “All gloomy music and dark movies.”
“That was a whole teen mood I had going on,” he replied, fingering his spikey hair. “I’m over it now.” He glanced at the movie. “Mostly.”
I motioned to myself. “Well, this is my regular state of mind.”
“Yeah, but it got better when Alex was around.” He playfully thumped my knee. “Like maybe the whole world didn’t suck so much anymore.”
“You ass.” I laughed. “The world does suck, and so do most people.”
“I’m serious. Maybe he was good for you,” he said, then cringed. “You kicked him to the curb, didn’t you?”
“I don’t know. Not exactly.” I sighed. “I just…”
He muted the movie. “Talk to me. You haven’t said much since you came home from your mom’s after Thanksgiving.”
I didn’t even know if I could put any of it into words. If I could, wouldn’t I be better at this communication thing with Alex? I had been up to this point, but now that deep feelings were involved, I was at a loss.
“Okay, fine. Me and Bailey finally had it out, and Alex was the catalyst for that.” I blew out a breath. “He told us he was done with our shit, needed a break, then stormed out, leaving Bailey stranded for a ride. Well, not really stranded, but you get the point.”
“I’m starting to really like Alex.” Derek chomped down on one more chip before rolling up the bag. “Go on.”
I briefly screwed my eyes shut. “He told me I was too skeptical about relationships because of my parents’ divorce.”
He arched a brow. “All true.”
No argument there. Derek had been around long enough to know how it’d all gone down and how much it’d killed me to confess to Mom the secret about Dad’s affair. He also knew I’d suspected infidelity before, but that time had been hard evidence.
“He also said that unless I took a chance or had faith or something like that, I wouldn’t know if he and I could ever work out.” That got all jumbled, but the spirit of his argument was in there somewhere. That I needed to put myself out there. And here I sat, on the edge of the cliff, afraid of the inevitable fall.
“Ooh! Points for Alex.” Derek lifted his hand for a high five, then dropped it when I gave him an exasperated look. “And in response, you said…”
“Nothing. Because he didn’t give me the opportunity.” He was so fierce that day. I smiled to myself. “He yelled at Bailey, then walked out.”
Derek poked my chest. “And you’ve been mopey all week because you’re scared shitless of your feelings for him.”
“Pretty much.” I wasn’t going to deny it. He’d hit the nail on the head.
“And you claim Bailey is the scared one.” He scoffed. “How are you any better about facing your own feelings?”
I scrubbed my hand over my face in frustration. “And what’s your excuse?”
“I haven’t found the right girl yet,” he said like it was the simplest thing in the world. And maybe it was, for some people. “But when I do, I sure as fuck won’t let them go so easily.”