Total pages in book: 96
Estimated words: 91213 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 456(@200wpm)___ 365(@250wpm)___ 304(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 91213 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 456(@200wpm)___ 365(@250wpm)___ 304(@300wpm)
For all my talk about keeping this casual and not entering into a relationship, there is no doubt in my mind that I was heavily involved in a deep and meaningful relationship with Luc, because otherwise, it wouldn’t be hurting this fucking much not having him.
For all of my grandiose ideas of pushing him away so I couldn’t get hurt, I ended up getting fucking crushed by the pain of losing him.
Lucas put everything out on the table. He put his heart at risk without even blinking those gorgeous eyes. He dangled love and marriage in front of me like a worm on a hook, and I was too goddamned scared to take the bait.
Within twenty-four hours of Luc leaving my apartment after telling me I was essentially going to fuck our child up, I got a voice mail from Jules. It was short and kind and she offered to talk when and if I was ever ready. I ignored it for a few days before I reached out to her, letting her know I appreciated her concern but I was fine.
She didn’t buy it. She prodded me gently through text exchanges, but mostly she was inquisitive about how I’d been doing with the pregnancy, and I didn’t hold back on that. I assumed she’d pass the info on to Lucas for me.
He has the right to know, even if he’s not bothered to reach out to me once in the past two weeks to see how I’m doing. He went from caring and vigilant to frustrated to infuriated to nothing.
Absolutely nothing at all.
I have to shake my head clear of those thoughts because they’ll drag me down into misery, and I’ll be damned if I want to suffer another crying spell filled with regret.
Opening the door to the restaurant, I immediately spot Jules waiting for me near the hostess podium. She quickly rakes her eyes over me as if she’s trying to determine how I’m feeling. She beams a smile at me as she walks my way, opening her arms for a hug.
This has always been awkward to me, but for some reason, I easily accept her embrace. Maybe some of the ways I’d opened up over the last few months have stuck. Or maybe it’s just that I want to be close to Lucas and the only way is through Jules.
Regardless, when she pulls back she holds my shoulders and looks down at my belly briefly before looking back up again. “You have a baby bump.”
That breaks the ice right there and I laugh as I look down, running a hand over the slight swelling that’s easily discernable under the tight tank top I’d worn with a pair of stretchy jeans. “It’s about right on time, although truth be told, not sure if that’s the baby or the Cherry Garcia ice cream causing that.”
Jules laughs. “Who cares? It’s adorable.”
Lucas would think so. He’d been waiting for that to happen. I push down the longing that creeps up and make my smile brighter.
The hostess approaches us with menus and we break apart to follow her to our table. After we sit down and study our menus, we talk about Jules’s kids and how I’ve been feeling until the waitress takes our orders.
“So when is your next appointment?” Jules asks after sipping her iced water.
“Next Friday. I’ll be at thirteen weeks.”
“Well, you look amazing. You’re glowing, actually,” she says with a wave of her hand in my direction. “I’ve heard pregnancy could do that to you.”
“I actually feel pretty good,” I admit to her.
“I kind of thought I’d be getting a beat-down, haggard-looking Stephanie who was completely depressed or something,” she says, and my jaw drops wide open.
She did not just go there.
But she watches me with the eyes of a hawk to gauge my reaction.
I merely stiffen my backbone and say, “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m doing wonderful.”
“Huh,” Jules grunts. “It’s just…Lucas isn’t—”
“Don’t want to talk about him,” I say quickly as I hold my hand up. “You said you wanted to talk about Intergen so that’s why I’m here.”
This throws Jules off. “Intergen?”
“Yeah. Short for intergenerational activities. Cool, right?”
“It’s horrid,” Jules says with a wrinkled nose. “Sounds like a pharmaceutical company or something. Or, wasn’t that the name of the company that manufactured the dinosaurs in Jurassic Park?”
My brows pinch together. “Well, what should I call it?”
“Something fun and cute,” she says with a shrug. “Maybe something like Tots to Pops or something.”
“Seriously?” I ask with my own nose wrinkling. “That sounds like a convenience store name. Short for tater tots to soda pops.”
Jules snickers and I can’t help it…I do too.
“Listen,” Jules says soberly as she reaches across the table to take my hand. “I didn’t mean to hit you with your break-up with Lucas. I just want you to know that I can be objective and listen to your side of things. Lord knows I’ve heard his side.”