Kind of a Sexy Jerk (The Mcguire Brothers #5) Read Online Lili Valente

Categories Genre: Alpha Male, Suspense Tags Authors: Series: The Mcguire Brothers Series by Lili Valente
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Total pages in book: 86
Estimated words: 81076 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 405(@200wpm)___ 324(@250wpm)___ 270(@300wpm)
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GRAM: I wouldn’t give you gross sex tips, honey. I wouldn’t mean to, anyway. But I guess one woman’s fuzzy handcuffs is another woman’s ball gag and fisting.

NORA: Who are you? What have you done with my grandmother?

GRAM: I wasn’t always an old woman with arthritis, you know. I had my first boyfriend when I was only thirteen. After I won Junior Miss Bad Dog in 1959, Daddy couldn’t keep the boys away. I was pretty wild in my twenties, too, for a small town girl in the 60s. Cassie Ann Sweetwater and I painted this town red every Saturday night. I’m pretty sure both our parents thought we were going to hell in a handbasket, but we sure did have a good time.

NORA: About Cassie Ann Sweetwater… Are you two still friends?

GRAM: No, not really. We’re cordial when we meet in passing, but things changed between us when her daddy died, and she took over the family business. I don’t believe in judging people, but Cassie Ann was such a smart woman. She could have made a fabulous life for herself without getting mixed up in all that criminal nonsense.

And not long after she started down that road, I met your grandad and settled down. Our lives went in different directions. Why do you ask?

NORA: Just wondering. I drove by her cupcake shop today on my way to meet Sam. It got me to thinking about the old pictures of you two in your scrapbook.

She would probably let someone out of the mob, right? If they wanted to leave? She’s not like one of those bosses from the movies who believes in loyalty until the day her minions die, or they get a horse head on their pillow, right?

GRAM: What’s this really about? I thought you wanted sex tips not the dirt on Cassie Ann Sweetwater. If Sam’s mixed up with the mob, you should stay away from him, Nora. There are other fish in the sea, fish who aren’t going to get you into trouble.

NORA: I’m not with Sam. I’m with someone else.

GRAM: What? How? What happened to Sam?

NORA: I’m not sure, honestly. He never texted when I didn’t show up. Maybe he isn’t as interested as I thought. Or maybe he’s waiting for me to text and apologize for ghosting. Which I’ll do as soon as I’m through chatting with you. Though I do need to hurry and get in the shower. If I let the water run much longer, the man I’m with will know I’m doing more than showering in here.

GRAM: Who is this man and where are you? I don’t like this, Nora. First, you lied to me about where you were going, then you stand up Sam and start asking questions about the mob. My phantom pinkie toe is tingling.

NORA: You don’t have a phantom pinkie toe. Your pinkie toe is still very much attached to your body.

GRAM: But I almost lost it. It was separated from my body for an entire fifteen minutes.

NORA: Which is what you get for trying to mow the lawn in your 70s. You should have waited until I hired a new service, like I told you.

GRAM: But then I wouldn’t have my phantom pinkie toe that tingles when trouble is on the horizon. And it’s tingling big time right now. Come home, honey. Your sexual liberation has waited this long, it can wait a little longer, until you find a good, safe man with a steady job and no criminal connections.

NORA: I don’t want a safe man. I want this man. He’s good, too, just…a little confused. But I’m going to help him become unconfused by luring him into my web of seduction and showing him how great we could be together.

There’s so much chemistry between us, Gram, and it’s not all physical. There’s an emotional connection, too, I can feel it, and I know he feels it too, even if he doesn’t want to admit it just yet.

But he will. Soon, with the power of fantastic sex, affection, and gentle but persistent nagging, I’ll have him back on the straight and narrow.

GRAM: Oh, sweet Jesus. I knew I shouldn’t have let you watch soap operas when you were a teenager. Real life isn’t like that, baby. You can’t save the bad boys.

NORA: He’s not a bad boy.

GRAM: He’ll just drag you down along with him. Come home, Nora. Right now.

NORA: I’m not coming home, Gram. Not yet. I’ll be back in a couple days.

GRAM: Fine. If you won’t come home, I’ll get Aaron to track you down and drag you home. He knows how to work that app, the one that shows where your friends are.

NORA: Yes, he does. But it won’t work if I disable it and turn off my phone, which I’m going to do as soon as we’re done here, Gram. I shouldn’t have reached out. This was a mistake.


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