Total pages in book: 87
Estimated words: 83085 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 415(@200wpm)___ 332(@250wpm)___ 277(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83085 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 415(@200wpm)___ 332(@250wpm)___ 277(@300wpm)
I nodded, thankful for that at least. Then I sat quietly, watched Griff get dressed and walk out. As I moved to get out of the bed, my eyes snagged on something on the floor where his jeans had been.
I picked it up—it was his turtle. The one I gave him when we went away. He still carried the damn thing in his pocket, and I hadn’t known.
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
Griffin
I’m home.
Ok…thanks for letting me know. You didn’t have to leave. I wish you hadn’t. I’d like to talk to you.
I need to figure some things out.
I’d been staring at the texts Josh and I sent on and off all night. I hadn’t slept for shit. Every time I closed my eyes, my thoughts journeyed back to him: the way he felt beneath me, being inside him, the words that had spilled from my lips. I love you. Jesus, I’m so goddamned in love with you.
They were true, of course. It was something I’d already acknowledged to myself, but it hadn’t been something I wanted to say to him. Josh wasn’t ready. I’d told him I was on the same page as he was. Hell, the first person I enjoyed sex with and had a fling with, and I’d gone and fallen in love with him. What a mess.
I was in the backyard, on the porch. It was early, just after seven. The morning was foggy, the air thick with moisture as a cool breeze made the hair on my arms stand on end. My cell was in my hand. I kept flipping it over and over before I made a call and held it up to my ear.
“Griff? What’s wrong?” Kellan answered.
“Nothing. I just…” Just couldn’t finish. Just didn’t know what to say. “Nothing. I’m sorry I called so early.”
“Are you at home?”
“Yeah.”
“I’ll be right there, big brother.” He hung up before I could argue with him. The thing was, I didn’t think I would have. It was why I’d called, wasn’t it? I needed my brother.
I didn’t move from my spot. It wasn’t long until I heard a car in the driveway, then Kellan in the house before he was coming out the back door.
“I brought coffee.” He handed me a paper cup from the coffeehouse in town.
“Thanks.”
“What’s wrong?” Kellan sat in the chair beside me. It took me a moment to reply, but he didn’t push, just sat there and waited until I was ready. Kellan was good like that, good in ways I didn’t think people always gave him credit for.
Finally, it could have been a minute or an hour later, I said, “I’m in love with Josh.”
“Oh…wow…I guess I’m not surprised. I figured you were already halfway there to have even started this with him. That’s why…”
That was why he’d been unsure. Because Kellan knew I would fall for Josh and that Josh wouldn’t feel the same. He’d told me he was trying, but I didn’t know how far that went. If love was a step too far.
“Did you tell him?”
“Yeah…” I nodded. “Didn’t really mean to. I’d planned to keep it to myself, but I was a bit lost in the moment. I think I made a rookie mistake.” Telling someone you love them for the first time in the middle of sex, someone who’d already told you they didn’t have that to give. How cliché was that?
“Okay, I’m assuming I know what you mean by that, but I’m still trying not to think about the fact that you and Josh are having sex.”
“Now you see how I’ve felt this whole time.” I cocked a brow at him, and he smiled.
“That’s beside the point.”
“Of course it is.” That’s what he always said about it.
“What happened when you told him?”
“I finished and left.”
“Oh, ew.” We chuckled, and it was nice to have that moment of levity right then. “But he let you leave? I can’t fucking believe he let you leave. I’m going to kill him.”
“Don’t. It’s not his fault.”
“I’m pretty sure it is.”
“You want me to stay out of what happens with you and Chase. You need to do the same here. The truth is, it’s complicated—things with Josh. And I knew that going into it. I knew what the score was. Hell, I wanted it. I was so entranced by how I felt, by how much I wanted him, that it was all I saw. I just knew that being with Josh felt good, and I hadn’t felt good in…probably ever, so I held on. But Josh never lied to me. He never made me believe he could fall in love with me.” It was hard to explain without betraying Josh’s trust. Yeah, things had started to change between us. He’d asked for time and said he was trying, and part of me believed he was. But I’d rushed. I’d pushed. I’d given him something he said was difficult for him, and a guy like Josh would want to give that in return, even if it was too much for him.