Total pages in book: 114
Estimated words: 103918 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 520(@200wpm)___ 416(@250wpm)___ 346(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 103918 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 520(@200wpm)___ 416(@250wpm)___ 346(@300wpm)
I could see it through the way his body was slick with sweat. I could see it through the flex of his muscles as he thrust in and out of me in tiny increments, going a little deeper each time. I could see it in the way he panted and grunted as he clung to me. I could see it in how his fingers bit into my skin and his whispers floated around me.
I didn't need to see him to know how gorgeous he looked, how perfectly we fit together.
"Lex," Gideon groaned as his arm curled around the side of my face and his fingers gripped my hair. I was equally wrapped around him. My arms were at his back and I had my ankles locked together just above his ass.
Gideon rocked into me over and over until his balls brushed my skin. He was so deep inside of me that it felt like he'd always been there. That he'd always been a part of me.
When his mouth closed over mine, I did my best to kiss him back, but I was in sensory overload. Everything was almost too much.
Almost.
"Gideon, please," I begged. His lips skimmed my cheek as he pulled out of me.
"I have you, Lex," he breathed and then he slid back into me. He repeated the move over and over again—long, slow, deep glides that were making me crazy. I wanted it to go on forever at the same time that I needed it to end. My release was right there beneath my skin and I both craved and feared it. I'd always thought of it as just a physical release, but what Gideon was doing to me went so far beyond that.
The slow, smooth glides soon turned into hard, deep thrusts that had my entire ass rocking off the bed. The friction he created inside of me fed into that mysterious sensation that grew and grew the harder he fucked me.
"Lex, talk to me," Gideon said almost desperately. I could hear the fear in his voice and knew why it was there. Despite the obvious pleasure he was feeling, he was afraid for me.
"It's so good, Gideon. Don't stop. Don't ever stop."
His mouth came crashing down on mine and I kissed him with everything I was. After that, it was a while before we spoke again. With words, anyway. Our need was clear enough as we clung to one another. I buried my face in Gideon's neck as the orgasm hung there on the precipice.
"Gideon," I cried. His name came out on a half sob.
"Go over, sweetheart," Gideon whispered in my ear. "I'm right behind you."
Gideon thrust into me hard once, twice and then I was flying. I called out Gideon's name as the release crashed over me. Waves of pleasure rocked through me and I was sure that if Gideon's weight hadn't been pressing me into the bed, I would have floated away. Gideon's hoarse shout washed over me as he shoved into me hard. I felt the heat of him inside of me as he held me in a tight grip. His hips continued to pump into me as he came.
When Gideon collapsed on top of me, I welcomed his weight wholeheartedly. I turned my head so I could kiss the shell of his ear and then his neck. That was all I could reach because he’d buried his face into the bedding. His breath continued to come out in heavy pants, much like mine. He was still lodged deep inside of me, and I wished there was a way that he could stay there.
With the waning release came the despair. I didn't want to lose this, but I didn't know how to keep it either. I wanted to tell him how much I loved him, but the words got stuck in my throat. It wasn't that I wasn’t sure about my feelings.
I was.
And while they were nothing like what I'd felt for Grady, the effects of my ex’s rejection still lingered. I'd survived Grady, but I wouldn't survive Gideon reminding me of the things I already knew.
That I wasn't enough. And that in some ways I was too much.
My health, even at its best, would always be a burden to any man who chose to make a life with me. And while Gideon was beyond patient when it came to my sight, I knew that couldn't last. There would come a day where it would be a hindrance and he’d resent me…
No, I couldn't say the words that were screaming to escape my throat. I could only tuck them away deep inside of me in a place where I could bring them to the surface when I didn't feel strong enough to deal with things. I’d remember this exact moment where I wasn't blind, sick Lex. I was just Gideon's Lex.