Total pages in book: 90
Estimated words: 89012 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 445(@200wpm)___ 356(@250wpm)___ 297(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 89012 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 445(@200wpm)___ 356(@250wpm)___ 297(@300wpm)
I shrug. “I just don’t want us to wind up hating each other. I love you too much for that.”
My throat tightens. I freeze.
She takes a deep, shaky breath. “We’re friends. We’ve always loved each other. I’m not sure how we could ever hate one another.”
I close my eyes. Thank you for that save, Ash.
“Promise me,” I say.
“Promise you what?”
“Promise me that you’ll always be honest. That you’ll walk away before you hold on to this just because it’s what we’re doing.” I suck in a breath. “That it won’t be like fizzle-fuck and you where things weren’t working, but you stayed anyway.”
“Fine. But you promise me that you won’t drift away from me like you do everyone else because you don’t want to put the work in to building something real.”
I flinch. “I don’t do that.”
“No, you do. You’ve had so many women who would’ve loved to try something with you, and you just keep it so loose so they don’t get too close.”
I swallow. That’s not what I do. I keep them loose because they aren’t you.
The realization is so plain and simple it makes me want to puke.
As soon as the thought rolls through my brain, it’s like a fog clears in my head. A fog that has been trying to clear for a long time, but I’ve clung to it.
It’s true. It’s always been true. She’s always been the one that I want. From the moment her little lips trembled in first grade because she was going to get in trouble, I loved her. I fell for her that day, if I’m being honest.
She’s why I’ve never settled down. She’s why I’ve never felt anything with anyone else. She’s why I could never see myself married or with kids because it was never with her.
It’s never been a childish crush like my brothers have thought. It’s always just been … her. The girl who I knew would fit. Whose joy I want to swim in. Whose hugs I want to enjoy daily and whose heart simply won’t quit.
I want that forever.
But the thought of committing to her like that, putting that responsibility on my shoulders, is terrifying. What if she looks at me someday and I can’t give her what she needs? What if I can’t protect her? What if I fail her?
I’d never live with myself.
“Promise me?” she whispers.
“Promise.”
She smiles against my chest.
“Want one more round of vacation sex before we leave?” I ask.
“Hell, yeah.” She springs up, throwing the blankets off her. But before she straddles me, her phone buzzes. “Who could that be?”
“How do I know?”
She crawls across the bed, her bare ass up in the air as she reaches for her phone. She sits up and scrolls the screen. Her forehead is wrinkled.
“Who is it?” I ask.
“It’s my credit card company.”
“Is everything okay?”
She sets her phone in her lap and looks at me. “I need to make some calls.”
“Okay. What can I do? What’s happening?”
“My credit card was just refunded for this trip,” she says, her brow furrowed. “It was the only card on file, so I don’t get it. I paid in full weeks ago, and obviously, we took the trip. We’re here.”
Oh shit.
I thought I’d have more time. Mostly, I thought she’d be somewhere else when this happened.
She sighs and starts to get off the bed. “Let me go look up some numbers.”
I put my hand on her thigh. “Wait.”
“What?”
“So …” I swallow nervously. “I might’ve had my buddy James help me out and figure out how to refund your payment and place it on my card.”
Her eyes almost fall from her head.
“I just … I couldn’t …” I shrug.
She spins around to face me. I’m not sure if it’s anger or surprise or happiness or disbelief in her eyes, but it’s something.
I grimace.
“Maddox …”
“Look, maybe some men,” I say, refusing to use her ex’s name, “would let you pay for a vacation, but I’m not that man. And I’m sure as hell not the man who’s going to let my wife pay for our honeymoon.”
A slow smile tickles her lips. “You know we’re not married, right?”
“We are until we board that plane home.” Might as well tell her everything. “In first class.”
She gasps. “You did that too?”
“I was late. Thanks to Sara. And I was worried you were gonna be pissed if I showed up, so I wanted to sweeten you up just in case.”
She smacks my chest, but I pull her on top of me.
“This was my trip,” she says. “I didn’t ask you to come to pay for it.”
“You’re right. You didn’t ask me at all, and if you would’ve had your way, I would’ve been booking a ticket home from the airport.” I lean up and kiss her. “This was our trip. I got just as much enjoyment out of it—actually, probably more—than you did.”