Total pages in book: 43
Estimated words: 38978 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 195(@200wpm)___ 156(@250wpm)___ 130(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 38978 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 195(@200wpm)___ 156(@250wpm)___ 130(@300wpm)
What I did understand was the look on his face; he was not happy. Whatever, join the fucking club. What did everyone want from me anyway?
I had hardly seen anyone since the meeting with James, which was fine by me. I wondered where the rest of them were now if they'd heard her? But no one came to investigate.
I wanted her to stop making that noise. I don't think human beings are supposed to sound like that. It was scaring the piss out of me.
"Come on, Suzette, please stop it." I climbed up on the bed and pulled her into me, trying for some reason to synchronize our breathing. I don't know what the fuck that was supposed to do, but it seemed like a hell of an idea to me. Her heart was beating so fucking fast it reminded me of a hummingbird's wings. Fast and furious.
"Please, babe, please, please, please." I was fucking pleading, anything to make her stop, to bring her back from wherever the fuck she'd gone.
Dad injected her with something. Lucky for him, I didn't see him, or I would've laid his ass out. My girl hates needles.
It was a long five minutes before the sedative kicked in, and she calmed the fuck down. I couldn't stop kissing her forehead and found myself humming her lullaby, the one I'd made up for her so long ago.
After my dad left, locking the door behind him, I held her close to my heart.
Obviously, I needed to change my game plan; first things first, I needed to make a decision and quick unless I wanted this girl to completely lose her fucking mind. I had to decide whether or not I could forgive her, if I could live with her again, put this whole fucking nightmare behind me and move the fuck on. My heart already knew what it wanted, but my head was hard as fuck.
I drew her even closer, trying to give her my strength, somehow still hearing that cry ringing in my ears. I pulled back, looking down at her beautiful face, and broke the fuck down.
I cried for her, for me, for us, for what we had, what we'd lost, what could never be again, because no matter what the future held, we would never be what we once were. I cried most of all for that. The end of something beyond wonderful.
"Gage."
I knew she wasn't awake since I'd been staring at her for the last few minutes; once again, she was calling for me in her fucking sleep.
"I'm here, sweetheart; I'm right here; I'm not going anywhere."
CHAPTER 27
I awakened with her still in my arms. With my first indrawn breath, I tasted renewal. I now realized that I had been fooling myself all this time. I told myself I was tough, I had to be hard, that I didn't care what others thought, but the truth, as it turns out, is quite the opposite. I have been going on what others think; my manly pride and bruised ego had taken a hit.
I guess it took seeing my woman crumble like Siamese ash to bring me back to my fucking senses. I haven't the first fucking clue as to how to go about making us whole again, but I knew I was willing to try. I'm sure shit was going to be fucked up for a while, yet, I'm a grudge-holding motherfucker, and though I'd shielded butterfly from the worst part of me, I didn't think that was going to be possible any longer.
I promised myself while lying there that I would take dad's advice to heart; if I said the words I forgive you to her, then I would never hold this against her again. That meant I had to work on that forgiveness shit. Because let's face it, it's going to take some time. I had a whole lot to think about now, not the least of which was what to do with that fuck, Terry Poole.
I should just pay James to off him, but I didn't want that shit on my conscience, plus the whole world was probably watching to see what I was going to do to his punk ass. It seemed like such a long time since that meeting, days instead of just a few hours, but so much had happened in the meantime. It had been one long-ass motherfucker of a day.
My girl was clinging onto me in her sleep the way she usually did; her breathing finally evened out, thank fuck. I wondered how those two fucks didn't send her over the edge with their lies with the way she was acting now; I wondered what was the best thing to do for her now.
I'm sure for anyone else, therapy would be ideal, but fuck if I was going to some asshole to tell me his opinion on what the fuck I should do with my life, go live your own and leave mine the fuck alone is what I say, but that's just me. One thing was for sure we needed some serious motherfucking help. Fuck if I knew where to find it. Oh well, I'll think about it when I wake up; my ass was tired.