Total pages in book: 90
Estimated words: 87933 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 440(@200wpm)___ 352(@250wpm)___ 293(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 87933 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 440(@200wpm)___ 352(@250wpm)___ 293(@300wpm)
Ben’s gaze flits from mine to Jordan’s and back again. Then he nods. “If you’re both comfortable with it.”
“Why wouldn’t we be?” I say breezily. “Jordan’s tongue in my mouth is my second favorite thing.”
“Oh really?” Jordan asks. “What’s the first?”
“When you put it somewhere else.”
Jordan looks like he’s trying not to laugh, but Ben grunts and walks back to his spot behind the camera monitors.
We get through the call sheet, by some miracle, ahead of schedule. Jordan and I go to our separate trailers to shower and change to go home but meet up again to go in his car.
“Ben was … weird today,” I say on the way home.
“How so?”
“He was professional.”
“I think he might have been in shock. That whole shnookums thing had to have thrown him. He probably spent the rest of the day trying to poke holes in our story.”
Or he doesn’t care, I want to say but don’t. I won’t hurt Jordan by pointing out Ben doesn’t seem all that upset over their breakup.
I did see the flash of hurt in Jordan’s eyes when Chad brought Ben some coffee and took the seat next to him to watch the scenes we were shooting.
The thing is, though, I don’t actually think Jordan even likes Ben. It’s the betrayal that stings, and it has been years of men doing the same thing to him over and over. They experiment with him and marry someone else.
Jordan pulls up to Denver and Mason’s place and idles on the street.
I’m about to get out when I realize I don’t want to say goodbye. “Got any dinner plans?”
“I’ve imposed on Denver and Mason too much. You should go in and have dinner with them.”
“They’re still in Montana for a few more days.” My heart’s in my throat as I say the next words, but not because of what I’m asking but what it implies. “You should come in.”
Yep, I may as well have said, “You should come inside me.”
Jordan hesitates for only a tiny second before he agrees. “Where do I park?”
Chapter Sixteen
Jordan
After the shitshow that was today, I should go home to my apartment, slip under my covers, and go to sleep. Instead, I’m sitting on a stool in Denver’s kitchen as Blake moves around the space confidently, like he doesn’t have the same regrets I do.
As long as I can keep my hands to myself, I’ll be fine. My body might be screaming at me to throw myself at him and keeps imagining how good we could make each other feel, but I’m strong enough to resist.
I think.
I fucking hope.
When Blake slides a plate over my way, I stare at it.
“I thought you said you were making your specialty? This is—”
“Grilled cheese is my specialty. You think I can cook? None of us Eleven guys can, except Ryder. I’ve been living out of a suitcase, mostly in hotels, for the last ten years.”
“Why is that? I thought it was weird that you’re crashing with Mason and Denver and don’t have a place of your own.”
“I was living in a hotel because I didn’t know what my next moves were. I don’t see the point in renting a place or buying somewhere when I’m hardly home. I used to have a house in Montecito when Eleven were together, but I was hardly ever there. I gave it to my parents when I started the Coby movies, and I’d feel weird being all ‘Okay, I’m coming home now. Get out.’”
“You could live with them.”
“With my parents? I could. If I wanted to be smothered to death by their love.”
“Oh no, the problem loved children have!”
Blake laughs. “Touché. They’re great people, don’t get me wrong. I visit them whenever I can and make sure I catch up with them, but I like my own space. When I’m home, I still feel like a child, and it’s too weird. Plus, it’s not exactly close. Just far enough to be a pain in the ass if I’m working in LA.”
“Fair enough.”
I bite into the grilled cheese and throw Blake a thumbs-up. “At least you didn’t fuck up the easiest thing to cook.”
“It’s why it’s my specialty.” He joins me at the counter, pulling up another stool. “So how are you really doing after today?”
I mock gasp. “Is this a pity grilled cheese?”
“If I pitied you, I would have ordered in and gotten alcohol.”
“Oh, so you don’t love me enough to give me the good stuff?” As soon as the words are out of my mouth, I want to wince because it sounds so sexual it’s not even funny.
Okay, maybe it is funny because Blake throws his head back and laughs. “I’ll give you the good stuff if you want it, but I thought we agreed not to go there.”
“I was talking about food and wine. Get your mind out of the gutter.” But no, seriously, please stay there.