Total pages in book: 130
Estimated words: 117336 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 587(@200wpm)___ 469(@250wpm)___ 391(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 117336 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 587(@200wpm)___ 469(@250wpm)___ 391(@300wpm)
His secrets. He didn't want me to know about the drakoni being held against their will.
That's why he didn't give me his fires. It would have meant we were sharing minds, and he wasn't ready to share that with me, not when he knew I wouldn't approve. That makes the hurt a little less, but I'm still puzzled as to why he'd give me his bite now. Did he think he was going to lose me one way or another? I touch my neck, rubbing the pleasant-feeling spot. Or was there simply nothing else to hide any longer?
And he was so frantic over me that he shifted forms and lost control of his mind. Or maybe it was the bite that caused him to go feral, to give in to his dragon side. Either way, it feels as if the pieces I'm missing are locking into place. In a way, I knew about the bite. I knew there was some sort of bond between drakoni and mate, something that calmed them. Something that allowed the pregnancies to happen. But I've been so wrapped up in my own world that I never stopped to ask what that thing was…and why Azar wouldn't give it to me.
But he gave it to me while I was dying. As if he wanted to lay claim to me before it was too late. I consider the consent side of things, but I did tell him to do whatever he could to keep me alive. Maybe the bite had something to do with it. Maybe it kick-started the drakoni blood in my system. Who knows. We're dealing with a completely different biology and I barely have the answers for human biology.
I'm better, though. I'm better and Azar isn't. I lick my lips and look up at Gwen. "I think Azar gave me his fires and that made him turn."
She doesn't seem surprised. She nods slowly. "I honestly thought you'd had them all this time. But maybe that's why he lost control. Maybe to claim a mate he has to tap into the side that the Salorians try so hard to ignore." She gives me a thoughtful look. "I guess the question is, what are you going to do now?"
I rub that spot on my neck, considering. If we have a mental connection, I can reach him. Talk to him, despite the fact that he's turned dragon. There's no question in my mind. "I'm going to bring him back."
And then I'm going to insist he show me his thoughts so I can make sure there's nothing else he hasn't told me.
It takes another day or two before I feel up to going anywhere. I relax in bed, eat all the food put in front of me, and discuss patients and clinic business with Gary. My sickness forced him and Alma to step up, and they've been doing a great job running things. We're getting more patients than ever before, but things are going smoothly enough. I'm encouraged. It means I can leave for a week or two—however long it takes to find Azar—and not worry that I'm somehow harming Fort Dallas's people.
Once I feel strong enough to return to normal, I head to the compound and to Azar's quarters. I haven't been here in months, but it looks the same as when I left it, right down to the bed, with two pillows on my side just how I like it. My dresses are in the closet, my jewelry on the dressing table, as if he's just waiting for me to return. My heart squeezes at the thought.
I'll get him home and back to himself first, I tell myself, then we can figure out what's going on between us.
I pack my favorite yellow dress along with more sensible clothing, some sturdy shoes, and then head to the kitchens. I spend several minutes hugging the staff, all of whom are excited to see me again and also worried about Azar. One of the militia men named Daniels has been handling the biggest problems while Azar has been gone, but the staff is worried he won't come back.
"He's prickly some days," the cook says, packing me a bag of food. "But he's good to us and we're never hungry. He makes sure we all have jobs and a way to earn food and shelter. Can't ask for more than that in the After." She hands me the bag, now stuffed full. "Go and bring him home before this fort falls apart again."
I thank her and head over to the barracks, spending several minutes looking for Daniels before I find him. He's handling a flurry of tasks, directing people and going over inventory with another. I interrupt long enough to tell him that I need a bicycle and a handgun. He doesn't ask questions, just takes me to the quartermaster, and a short time later, I'm at the gates of Fort Dallas with a ten-speed bicycle and a gun holstered at my hip.