Total pages in book: 80
Estimated words: 75871 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 379(@200wpm)___ 303(@250wpm)___ 253(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 75871 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 379(@200wpm)___ 303(@250wpm)___ 253(@300wpm)
Colby continued to touch him, playing with the hairs on his chest. This was surprisingly easy, sharing these things with Colby, letting him in this way.
“Anyway, I lived a great life. Accomplished a lot. I can’t say I avoided relationships, not really. I dated a lot, hooked up a lot, and there were people I was with that I cared about deeply. But I never fell in love until Gregory.”
Jesus, what was it about that man? Vince couldn’t say for sure. Just that Gregory had a way of making a person feel special, like they were the most important thing in the world, when really, the most important thing to Gregory would always be Gregory. He was a master manipulator who knew how to say the right things, and somehow that had hooked Vince.
“When I found out he cheated on me…well, first I was pissed, of course. And then I was hurt. I’d finally given myself to someone, found the person I wanted to be with, and they hadn’t felt the same. Maybe if his thing with Liam had been a one-off, it wouldn’t have been so bad, but they’d carried on a relationship for nearly a year before I caught them together. I had a meeting at a hotel, and I saw them there. As soon as I moved out, he moved Liam right in. It was like I hadn’t mattered to him at all, which had been a huge hit to my ego.
“I swore I would never do that again. I met Holden, we started hooking up, which turned into dating, but I knew it would never go anywhere. I love Holden, but I wasn’t in love with him. I couldn’t allow that to happen, and I knew he would never fall in love with me either, so it worked. We had fun together, but neither of us put pressure on the other for more.”
He stopped, not wanting to continue, afraid if he did, Colby would look at him differently for being so fucking dumb.
His arm was still wrapped around Colby, and Vince let his fingers dance up and down the man’s arm.
“I’m here if you want to continue, but don’t feel obligated to tell me if you’re not ready. I won’t push.”
Vince nodded and kissed the top of his head. “I’m making this sound like it’s a huge thing, when it’s not.” But it felt like that to him. “I was stupid and fell for Gregory again. He’s so damn good at being who you need him to be, at playing the victim, and I’ll never forgive myself for falling for it. Somehow, he had me believing that none of it had been his fault. That he was somehow the victim. I fell right back into his trap, and he was fucking someone else the whole time—again. Apparently, he’d been sleeping with this man since he was with Liam. In the end, he didn’t even try to hide it. I guess he was tired of me. I came home, and he’d packed my things. The guy was there with him. He just…told me to go and that he didn’t want me anymore.”
It was one of the lowest moments of Vince’s life. There had never been a time he’d felt like trash as intensely as he’d felt right then.
“Jesus, Vince. That guy sounds like a narcissist. Tell me you know it’s not your fault. That you did nothing wrong and he’s a piece of shit. Nothing that happened says anything bad about you.”
“Yeah, but I’m the one who fell for him again. The one who didn’t see how vile he is. Who was willing to change my life for a man who is that terrible. How did I fall for him? How did I not see it?”
“Because that’s what people like him do! They’re predators. He’s a manipulator, and you would never think something like that about a person because you’re not the type who would ever treat someone that way. Never.”
No, no he wouldn’t. Still, though logically he knew Colby was right, he couldn’t help but think he should have known better.
“Thank you. Anyway, I just wanted to share that with you. Wanted to make sure you understand me.”
Colby was quiet, fingers still dancing along Vince’s skin. What was he thinking? Was he wondering how Vince had been so stupid? No, he didn’t want to think that, but why else wouldn’t Colby speak?
“Thank you. That means a lot to me. But all that did was show me how incredible you are.”
The words felt like a caress to his heart. Even more than that, like they somehow made it larger, fuller. “I’m not too bad,” he said playfully, then kissed the top of Colby’s head again. “We’re really good?”
“Yeah. You admitted something to me, so I guess I can also admit that I’m still kinda feeling a high about tonight. I don’t even know how to put it into words. It was like all these moments have been building up to what we did. All this pressure, and eventually we had to explode.”