Total pages in book: 120
Estimated words: 116254 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 581(@200wpm)___ 465(@250wpm)___ 388(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 116254 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 581(@200wpm)___ 465(@250wpm)___ 388(@300wpm)
“Stallion?” Breck tamped a laugh.
“Uh huh.” Ned grinned. “You’d never fall for a dude this bad if he wasn’t hung.”
Breck fought a smile. “Who screwed your head on wrong?”
Ned laughed, then quieted and sighed. “I’m happy for you, my boo. Your special someone finally came around and found you.”
Another smile tugged at Breck’s lips as he dared to hope. As he dared to imagine a future filled with everything that mattered. His chest grew lighter, his heart pounding faster.
Shoving to his feet, he blurted, “I wanna go to him now.”
“Then go.” Ned grinned.
“My dad’s gonna flip.”
“Your dad will get over it.” Ned shoved him toward the door. “You got this, tiger. Go get your man. Oh, and when you’re done with all that sweaty make-up sex, be sure to tell Mr. Hottie McYummy Pants I said hello.”
— SEVENTEEN —
Breck pulled up to Kai’s place a couple of minutes after ten, only to sit there in his car staring at the door. He knew why he’d come and what he wanted to do, but hadn’t really thought about the words he’d say.
Last time they talked, Kai had looked pretty damned determined not to go any further. To cut his proverbial losses and hang it up. Which, all things considered, Breck could totally understand. If the roles had been reversed, he’d feel the same.
Exhaling, he climbed out of his ride, hoping some fresh air might help his brain function better. Quietly, he closed the door behind him. Didn’t want to risk attracting Kai’s attention just yet. He wasn’t ready. His only game plan when he’d left Ned’s was to run home and shower, and then get to Kai’s. He needed to formulate an actual strategy so he could fix this mess.
Of course, now, as he stood at Kai’s place, he realized he had no idea how to do that. Kai had heard his apologies before. And ultimately, they hadn’t done shit to change his mind.
Breck started to pace beneath the big tree he’d parked beside. Hopefully, the promise of turning a new leaf would convince the man. Breck’s resolution to live his life in a more sustainable way.
Rubbing his skull cut, he nodded absently. Yeah, Kai would respect that. Knowing him, he’d probably even cheer Breck on.
He frowned. But would Kai take him back? Give them another chance? Was their connection strong enough to even support such a hope? The energy between them enough to hold the line?
Chest tight, he glanced up at Kai’s windows. That stretch of portals that breached into a world of so much bliss. Not just the sexual sort, though. The contentment kind, too. When Kai had made him dinner. When they’d eaten and talked. Shared parts of their lives in a way that, at least for Breck, he didn’t typically do. Spending time with a person who didn’t see him as merely an icon, or someone to compete with to see who could shotgun a twelve pack faster. But as an actual living, breathing person, with thoughts and emotions, intimate dreams and desires. Yeah, Ned and the others saw him for him, but only to an extent. To them, he was the guy they’d known since high school, and that was it.
With Kai, he was neither an idol nor an established perception. He was the man he chose to be in any given moment. That’s how Kai rolled and Breck fucking loved that. Made him feel so fucking free to live in the present. In the now.
Breck gazed at the soft light glowing from those windows and wondered if Kai would offer him that freedom tonight. Letting the past be the past, the future yet to be seen. Or was Breck just fooling himself with a false sense of optimism. At the time, Ned’s little pep talk had sounded promising, but now that he stood just feet from Kai’s door, his confidence wavered.
Pivoting on his heel for another lap beneath the tree, the gist of Ned’s message circled back around in his mind. Stop listening to his head and start following his heart. Keep a clear perspective on what actually mattered. On the things in life that sated his spirit, not his fucking pride.
His conversation with his dad filtered back into his brain. But this time, his perspective on it was indescribably clear. It wasn’t that he’d lost interest in basketball, because he hadn’t. The NBA was still his dream. Not because of the fame and fortune, as he used to believe, but because he loved the game.
Not enough to sacrifice his future, though. To concede life with a partner and go it alone.
And certainly not enough to have to pretend for the rest of his life.
Just the notion of such an existence snuffed out all excitement. Made his lifelong goal suddenly feel like a lifelong sentence.
Excitement.
Ned’s advice from their racquetball game resurfaced, when he told Breck to go after what excited him most. To let it lead him because it knew the way. Which Breck could see now meant the same thing as following his heart.