Total pages in book: 60
Estimated words: 56606 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 283(@200wpm)___ 226(@250wpm)___ 189(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 56606 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 283(@200wpm)___ 226(@250wpm)___ 189(@300wpm)
I didn’t have a traditional mother. My aunt, she is my mom for all purposes. Except, in my head I know our truth. She’s not. She loves me like her own and I will forever tell anyone she’s my mom, but it doesn’t change biology. I don’t want this to become some generational curse. For Hollis, I’ll find a way to make things better.
“Dillon,” she says casually, but with a tightness in her voice that is unusual, “I want you to know, I might have overstepped.” Her face is serious and there is a hesitation that amps me up inside.
Immediately, I pause the sunscreen application and go straight to alert. This isn’t like her. We have always been relaxed, easy. Why now is she tensing?
“I called Anna,” she explains.
I nod, what is there to say?
“I thought she might want to see Hollis slide. I should have asked you first before I called her. I’m sorry.”
I sigh. I’m not frustrated with Maritza. She’s trying to be a good friend and not have Anna miss out. I hate that Anna doesn’t see how much she’s on the losing end of this life with our son. “No sweat, Zizi. She’s dealin’ with some shit. I invited her, so you didn’t offer information that wasn’t already available to her.”
“She seemed different today. I don’t know what’s going on at home. Not knowing you offered, I did invite her here. It’s Hollis’s first time sliding. I thought she might want to be included. Since this wasn’t planned for me to tag along, I didn’t want to intrude without offering her an opportunity to join us. I don’t want her to get the wrong idea about me and my intentions. I don’t want to overstep.”
I look to the sky for some kind of divine intervention. Frustration fills me. “Shit’s complicated with her.” I don’t want to get into how bad it is with anyone, but especially not Maritza.
She turns to face me. “I gather that with her reaction.”
“Is she coming?” There is no reason to beat around the bush. I need to mentally prepare for Anna to join us. I have failed in life, in my marriage, but I don’t need it on display for the people close to me.
Maritza shakes her head. “She is missing out,” she whispers sadly.
I don’t know why, but I lean over and press my lips to her forehead. “Her loss, Zizi.”
“I can’t imagine missing the fun days,” she tells me what I feel to my core as her hands come to rest on my hips. The embrace is natural in a way I’ve never experienced.
Pulling her to me, I hold her as I rest my chin on top of her head. “I don’t ever want to miss them either. I appreciate you wanting to include Anna. Time is a thief and he’s growing too fast.”
She relaxes against me with her cheek pressed to my chest. “Dillon, I think she needs help. She’s disconnected and I can’t seem to pull her back in. There is a saying, the days are long, but the years go fast. It’s the truth about kids. She is lost to the days, but she’s missing the years.”
“I know,” I mutter before releasing her needing some space. Having her close makes me crave more. “I have asked her to see someone. I took her to the doctors; they called it post-partum depression when he was little. Now, I don’t know what it is. She won’t go back to the doctor. I can’t help her because she doesn’t want help. All we can do is be here to give Hollis our time and attention, so he isn’t the one losing love from people around him.”
She smiles brightly, “I absolutely can do that. I love that little boy,” she looks to him.
“I know, baby, I know.”
Maritza, she embraces every milestone for Hollis as if it’s a reason to celebrate. It’s not just her, the entire club, they love being part of my son’s life. I never imagined this would be the family I made for myself. Leaving home years ago, I thought family was about husband, wife, kids, and a dog. Now, it’s so much more and I’m grateful for my club and what I have here.
I finish covering Maritza’s skin in the cream to prevent burns. She makes sure Hollis is slathered in the sunscreen before getting him to drink water. She is insistent with him about staying hydrated. It’s cute because she makes sure he likes drinking water. The way she takes care of my son is something I never expected. She will one day make a man very happy and to the children they raise together, she will be a present mom where her kids don’t question if she cares. It will be a beautiful thing for her. I hope she finds a man who will be devoted to her and gives her the world. There isn’t anyone who deserves it more.