Total pages in book: 100
Estimated words: 94630 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 473(@200wpm)___ 379(@250wpm)___ 315(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 94630 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 473(@200wpm)___ 379(@250wpm)___ 315(@300wpm)
“Everything’s fine.” Cam minced the words, serving them with a hard look to warn Peter off.
“I’d like to hear that from Jo.” Peter took an audacious step up and toward them. He grabbed Jo’s other hand and touched her back.
Jo looked from Peter to Cam like she was trapped between a rock and a very hard place. Cam wasn’t sure which he was, but he wanted to crush the bones in both Peter’s hands. That he was sure of.
“I’m fine, Peter, but let’s just go.”
She pulled away, letting Peter lead her down the steps. Cam walked down ahead of them, stepping into her path again, ignoring Peter’s protective presence. He cupped her face, but she wouldn’t look at him, instead studying the sidewalk beneath her feet.
“Baby, you know I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
“You’re one of those guys, aren’t you?” Peter asked, a sneer distorting his neat mouth above his neat goatee. “One of those guys who kind of stumbles through life, accidentally hurting everyone and then offering lame apologies.”
Cam leveled a look on Peter that should have felt like a flesh-eating virus.
“No, I’m one of those guys who will beat the living shit out of any preppy dickhead who thinks he can steal my girl.” Cam creased his mouth into a fake smile. “Met those before?”
“Cam, stop.” Jo put her hand to his chest. She knew him well enough to know if Peter breathed wrong, he’d be flat on the sidewalk. “I’m just going to…just going to go.”
“Baby, I—”
“When you needed space, you took it.” She straightened out the trembling line of her mouth before going on. “Now I’m asking you to give me the space I need.”
She finally shifted her eyes to him, and Cam really wished she hadn’t. He’d never seen that look before. Like he had whittled something away. Like he’d broken something he wasn’t sure he could fix. It was a hypodermic needle stabbing his heart. Cam stepped back, giving them space to pass. Jo walked past him and Peter followed, opening the door to his Land Rover. Peter didn’t bother glancing back. Just climbed into the driver’s seat and drove off.
Cam’s phone alert went off. Great. Time for Dr. Stein. Could his day get any worse?
Chapter Thirty-Five
You seem agitated.”
Cam glanced from his triple-time bouncing knee to the mangled Kleenex in his lap.
“So it’s your superior deductive reasoning that justifies your outrageous rate.”
Dr. Stein tilted her chin down, eyes peering over her spectacles.
“Does that usually work for you?”
“Does what usually work?” Cam crushed the question between his eyebrows.
“You know.” Dr. Stein leaned back in her leather seat, folding her hands over her stomach. “Lashing out so people don’t get too close. It’s a defense mechanism. It won’t bring you any closer to what you want, though.”
“And what do you think I want?”
“You tell me what you want. Based on the conversations we’ve had by Skype, I think I know.” Dr. Stein patted the sleek auburn bob that looked much more vibrant in real life than on-screen. “But I’d be interested in hearing from you.”
“What do you think?”
“Oh no. It’s not that easy. It doesn’t work like that.” Dr. Stein eased her glasses back up her nose, leaning forward to settle her elbows on the desk. “I don’t work like that. You have to tell me what you want out of this process because you have to know.”
What did he want? He couldn’t see past the image of Jo leaving him today with tears in her eyes. He wanted to stop fucking things up.
“Tell me what you’re thinking right now. Don’t edit.”
“I want to stop fucking things up.”
“How do you think you ruin things?”
“Now who’s editing?” Cam managed a grin. “I didn’t say ‘ruin.’”
She wasn’t fast enough to hide how her face softened infinitesimally. She kept her eyes stern, but he’d flaked an inch or two off her professional impassivity.
“What have you messed up?”
What was left of the grin curdled on Cam’s lips, spoiled by the memory of all the things he’d screwed up.
“You want a comprehensive list?”
“Sure, if you have one.”
“I had a little girl.” Cam’s throat was a furnace, with the words trapped like fiery coals. “Kerris was pregnant with her when she had a car accident.”
“It was an accident, Cam. You realize that, right?”
“It was my fault, though. Kerris was chasing me.”
“What else was your fault?”
“I see through you, you know. I know what you’re doing.”
“Oh, what’s that?” Dr. Stein seemed genuinely curious, but Cam wasn’t fooled.
“You want me to admit I think Mac abusing me was somehow my fault, but I don’t think that.”
“Good. Then we can move on. That would be ridiculous. To blame yourself for things that aren’t your fault.”
“I see what you’re doing. You’re still doing it. I’ve seen Good Will Hunting.”
“I typically recommend all my patients watch that movie.” Dr. Stein scribbled in the margin of her journal. “Just making a note that that won’t be necessary with you.”