Total pages in book: 213
Estimated words: 201920 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1010(@200wpm)___ 808(@250wpm)___ 673(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 201920 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1010(@200wpm)___ 808(@250wpm)___ 673(@300wpm)
She hit puberty first and it was damn good to her. Not so much to me.
“It’s perfect,” she answers with a wink.
“My mom would kill me,” I mutter as I take one last look in the mirror.
“Well, your mom’s not here, so there’s nothing to worry about,” Sam says like this is no big deal.
“I don’t know,” I say softly. Sam’s my friend. My best friend. I’ve never kept anything from her. She already knows my stomach’s acting up and I’m getting cold feet. She devoured half the pizza we ordered with the twenty bucks my mom left us for dinner. Almost all of my half is still untouched in the kitchen. I’m leaving the box on the counter. I know it’ll tick my mother off to see I left it out, but I do forget to put it away every time Sam stays over, and I don’t want her to think we were up to anything.
Like sneaking out.
My heart flutters with anxiousness, warning me, yet again, that this is stupid. That I’m stupid.
Sam’s face falls slightly and she leans against my dresser as she asks, “Is it because you think Mike’s going to want some?”
I huff out a sarcastic laugh and shake my head no as I stare at the ceiling to avoid her prying eyes. Yes. Yes it is.
“I thought you wanted to lose your V-card?” she asks me with genuine interest.
“I do,” I answer immediately. “I’ve been thinking about how I want to do it.”
“There’s nothing wrong with being a virgin,” Sam says, and there’s a look on her face I can’t quite place. Not even a trace of a smile is there. “If you want to wait, then wait.”
“It’s not that, I just really like him and what if he’s not into it?” I swallow thickly and pick at my nail polish. Dammit. Now it’s ruined. “Or what if that’s not what he expects?” I say and shrug as if it doesn’t matter, even though my tone doesn’t match the movement.
“But you want it too, don’t you?” she says. Samantha straightens her back and I can see her swallow as she looks directly ahead. “I want to know what it’s like,” she admits to me.
“I know. I want to know too,” I tell her as if that’s not obvious. “I just really like him, but if we do it tonight, is Mike going to think that I’m like … easy or something?”
“Oh please,” Samantha says and rolls her eyes. “You’re thinking about this too much. If you want to do it, then do it. If you don’t, then don’t.” She’s already back to facing the mirror and fixing her necklace. “It’s literally that easy,” she tells me as if she’s done this before when I know she hasn’t, then turns toward the dresser, the tension from just a moment ago apparently all but forgotten.
“We’re finally in high school, Allie,” Sam says and I nod my head, although I keep my eyes on my reflection. I wish I looked like I was old enough for high school. It’s clear Sam’s more mature, but it’s the confidence she has that I truly lack.
“Sneaking out is a rite of passage,” she tells me. “I get that you like Mike and all, but just have fun tonight.”
“But there’s so much pressure,” I say, feeling anxiety running through me again.
Sam shrugs, putting away her lip gloss and striding toward the bed for her shoes. “So what?” she asks me. “It’s just a party and it’s going to be a blast, and everything’s going to be fine.”
“Are you going to drink?” I ask her and then feel like I’m my mother.
She laughs and her eyes go wide as she says, “Duh!” While she ties up the laces to her shoes around her ankles she adds, “Are you even sure his brother got the beer?”
“He said he was getting all sorts of things.” Mike’s brother is a few years older and technically it’s his party. Mike invited me and Sam. I was so excited when he told me, but right now I’m feeling something completely different from excitement.
“And what’d you tell him?” she asks me.
“That I like vodka,” I say softly, feeling my cheeks heat with a blush and she laughs again.
“Have you ever even had vodka?” she teases me.
“Shut up,” I say then push her shoulder slightly and she just laughs some more, throwing her head back. “It’s not like you’ve had it before either.”
“Yeah, yeah. Hey, check this out,” Sam says in a singsong voice as she reaches into her tote bag. It’s all smooth black leather and I think she stole it from her mom’s closet.
“Holy shit,” I say under my breath with my eyes focused on the bottle.
“It’s like a party present or something,” Sam says as I pick up the bottle of red blend wine. “Hostess favor,” she says, although she sounds a little uncertain. “Is that what it’s called when you bring a gift to a party?” she asks me.