Total pages in book: 167
Estimated words: 157175 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 786(@200wpm)___ 629(@250wpm)___ 524(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 157175 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 786(@200wpm)___ 629(@250wpm)___ 524(@300wpm)
As I take the steps down to the BMW, I pull myself together, tamp down my want, and focus on the afternoon ahead. Taking the handle of the door, I look back as I pull it open, finding Jesse at the front door, his shoulder leaning against the door frame, his big arms folded across his big chest. He’s smiling. The crazy-arse loon.
Pivoting back to the car, I only just stop myself from falling into the seat. Or onto Jesse’s friend’s lap. Not that there’s much room with the huge black man taking up the driver’s seat.
‘What?’ I blurt, righting myself and taking the top of the door.
He lifts his wraparounds and beams at me, flashing a gold tooth. ‘Afternoon, girl,’ he rumbles, thumbing to the other side of the car. ‘It’s like the good old days, huh?’
My teeth clench with force that might crumble them, and I look up to find a very smug-looking man still holding position in the doorway. Unbelievable!
‘It’s you who will be getting punished!’ I yell, stomping around to the passenger side. I haven’t got time to argue; I’ll be late for my first class, and I certainly won’t be shifting the mountain of a man in the driver’s seat.
‘Look forward to it, lady!’ he calls on an irritating chuckle, earning a scowl from me that rivals any that he dishes out.
I slam the door and face John. ‘I can’t believe he’s got you driving me.’
John laughs, his huge sausage fingers gripping the wheel. ‘Girl, I drove you all over the place when you two first hooked up.’
‘It doesn’t surprise me,’ I say, staring at his profile thoughtfully. ‘I have déjà vu,’ I muse quietly, and he smiles. He has a lovely smile, warm and reassuring.
‘That doesn’t surprise me, girl.’ His left hand leaves the wheel, extending towards me, his palm face up. I lay mine in the huge shovel and he grips, firm but gentle. ‘Feeling overwhelmed?’
‘By so much.’
‘But mostly him, yes?’
‘He’s an intense man.’
‘Like I’ve said to you a million times before, girl, only with you.’ Setting my hand in my lap, he takes his own back to the wheel. ‘You and those kids are his world, but you know that already. Ain’t no man on this planet like Jesse Ward.’ He laughs under his breath a little, and I smile, sensing a fondness emanating from the big guy that feels somehow right.
‘You’re going to tell me to go easy on him, aren’t you?’
‘That motherfucker is fragile under all that bravado and muscle.’
‘He went through a lot. His brother, his uncle.’
John hums, returning his full attention to the road. ‘Looking forward to your first session with Elsie?’
Is it me, or has he just swiftly changed the subject? I frown. ‘I am. Do you remember someone called Sarah?’ I press my lips together, watching for his reaction.
‘Of course.’
‘Did you know she’s back?’
He casts his face slowly to mine. ‘I did.’ He’s giving me nothing, so I continue to press lightly.
‘Do I have anything to worry about?’
‘Girl, there’s not a woman dead or alive who would turn your husband’s head.’
‘But he turns theirs,’ I point out, knowing deep down that it’s not really my husband I need to worry about, but maybe a woman’s desperation. Jesse is stunning. Tall, confident, strong, and a whole heap of other things.
‘He doesn’t see any of them.’ His look now is almost stern, like he’s annoyed I’m letting something that’s apparently trivial bother me. ‘Only you exist in that man’s eyes, girl. Never forget that.’
I sigh, staring out of the window as we drive the streets of London. And I scold myself because though my memories are a little lost, my instinct isn’t. To Jesse Ward, I am life.
*
John drops me off with instructions to call him when I’m ready, and the first thing that hits me when I enter Elsie’s studio is the sound of background music, which I quickly determine is whale calls. The place is warm, the walls made up of dark wooden panels, only a few tiny spotlights scattered in between the dozens of floor-standing plants. A few tie-dye tapestries hang from the walls, and a small fountain in the corner trickles calming water down the side of glistening grey rocks.
‘Ava.’ Elsie’s voice matches the scene perfectly, all calm and soothing. It’s peaceful, tranquil, and I feel at ease. ‘How lovely to see you.’ Kissing me on both cheeks, she links arms with me and walks us to some bamboo doors, sliding them open. ‘This is where we’ll practise.’ She practically floats across the room, her long white cover-up trailing the floor. Taking a mat from a hook on the wall, she lays it down for me. ‘Let me take your bag and we’ll get started.’
‘Thank you.’ I give up my satchel and kneel. ‘I wasn’t sure what to wear.’ I pull at my leggings.