Total pages in book: 167
Estimated words: 157175 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 786(@200wpm)___ 629(@250wpm)___ 524(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 157175 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 786(@200wpm)___ 629(@250wpm)___ 524(@300wpm)
I carry her to a stool and get her comfortable on my lap, her legs straddling me, her face hiding in my chest, her tears soaking into my skin. With my face in her hair, I sigh, cuddling her close. Just giving her the time she needs to get this out of her system. It’s just another part of this excruciating process. One more bump in this rocky road. How many more bumps, knock-backs, and cries are to come is daunting. But I need to be strong.
The man she married.
‘Maddie loves Marmite in her sandwiches,’ I say into her hair. ‘And Jacob likes—’
‘Peanut butter,’ she sniffles, dragging her heavy head up until she has my eyes.
I smile, taking her hands and holding them between our chests. ‘I’m with you all the way, baby. High and lows, good and bad, I’m here by your side. To help you, to wipe your tears, to love you. I love you so fucking much, lady.’ I kiss her cheek, hovering there for a few seconds, inhaling her into me. ‘Never give up, do you hear me? We have too much to fight for.’
Her little sob is one full of emotion and relief. ‘Falling in love with you again was easy,’ she murmurs, so quietly. ‘This, though. The children. I love them. I didn’t need to fall, I just looked at them and knew. But part of being a good mother isn’t just loving them unconditionally. It’s knowing them inside out. What they like, what they hate.’ Her eyes close, her reality too much to bear, and I clasp the back of her head gently and tug her into my embrace. ‘I feel more lost now than ever. Just the look on their faces when I get something wrong.’
‘Stop it,’ I order. ‘Right this minute.’
‘I just hate disappointing them.’
‘You don’t disappoint them by forgetting what shit they like in their sandwich or what they have for breakfast. The only way you could disappoint them is by not loving them. By giving up. Am I going to have to take you upstairs and give you a Reminder Fuck?’ I’m deadly serious, too, so she better not question my threat.
‘A reminder?’ Looking up at me, she sniffles through a little laugh.
‘Yes, a reminder.’ I stand and she slides down my front to her feet. Slowly. Her palms on my bare chest. Her gaze there, too. Lust-filled. I smile on the inside, because no matter how shit the timing is, I’ve distracted her from her downheartedness, and for that I will never apologise. Distracting her has always been my area of expertise. I’m so thankful that’s not lost. Placing my hand between her thighs, I cup her, forcing her to breathe in deep.
‘Jesse.’ Her voice cracks with the fiery passion displayed in her brown eyes, though she makes no attempt to escape me. I drag my hand up to her hip on a smile and clamp lightly down on her tickle spot. That breath she was holding spills free, though she doesn’t move a muscle.
‘Tell me you’ll never question your capabilities as a mother again,’ I command, flexing my hand just a fraction to give her a hint of the torture she’s about to endure should she deny me. ‘Go on, baby.’
‘I’ll never question it again.’ The words pour from her mouth fast, hardly audible.
I pinch down and she bucks on a sharp squeal. ‘What was that?’ My smiling face gets close to her scowling face. ‘Say it again. Slowly so I can hear you.’
‘I’ll. Never. Doubt. Myself. Again.’ The second she’s spelled out my demand, she sucks in more air and holds it, waiting, bracing herself.
I hold her on the cusp of anticipation for a few moments, before shifting my hand to her thighs again and going in for the kill, slamming my mouth to hers and walking us to the nearest wall. This weapon, my ability to bring her back around, to distract her from some of her misery, is all I have, and I’ll use it with no remorse or hesitation. The feel of her soft boobs squished against my hard chest, every curve she has melding into every sharp muscle on me, ramps up my need.
Not great when the kids are within screaming distance. Not great at all. It doesn’t stop me attacking her lips with force, though, exploring her mouth as keenly as she’s exploring mine, her fingernails ravaging my shoulders and back, her whimpers of pleasure sinking into my brain and making my head spin with want rather than frustration.
‘Later.’ I bite on her lip and tug back, until it pops free of my teeth. ‘You are at my mercy, lady.’
‘Aren’t I always?’ Firm fists grab my hair and yank, pulling me back onto her mouth.
‘And don’t you forget it.’ We’re all clashing lips and teeth, rushed and clumsy. She thrusts her hips forward, catching my tented shorts.