Total pages in book: 210
Estimated words: 203847 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1019(@200wpm)___ 815(@250wpm)___ 679(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 203847 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1019(@200wpm)___ 815(@250wpm)___ 679(@300wpm)
I turn and walk to the door, grabbing my phone and keys from the kitchen counter as I do.
“Who’s the one who fights going on a date, Liv? It isn’t me!”
I yank his door open and look at him over my shoulder. “Dates are what you do with someone you’re interested in getting to know. And until you know why I fight your dates, don’t sit there all righteous and fucking judge me.”
His door slams loudly behind me, echoing in the empty hallway. I step into the elevator, my hands shaking, my heart pounding, my lungs constricting tightly.
I clench my fists and press my knuckles into my eyes. Breathe. One to ten. Breathe.
One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Seven. Eight. Nine.
The elevator doors open.
Ten.
I glance around, stupidly expecting him to be here although he has no reason to be. Why would he be? Sex. That’s what we agreed.
Except I really never should have agreed. It’s because of that split-second decision that I now can’t breathe. It’s why I have tears burning the back of my mind and my fingers are itching to press the buttons on the elevator.
Why every part of my being wants to travel back up there and run into him and beg him to glance over all my crap, just for now, and stay.
Why my stomach is twisting with the thought of not touching his skin, not hearing his voice, not having anything to do with him other than official wedding duties.
It’s why my addiction is taking hold, clamping down on me. Trying to force me to do what I know is wrong.
I 0stand in the middle of the lobby for what seems to be the longest few minutes of my life. I ignore everyone around me, ignore the doorman asking me if I’m okay.
Then I look up, I turn, and I walk out of the door.
“Dill, have you ever wanted something you know is really bad for you?”
He laughs, his whole body shaking, and lifts his pint. “Every day, darlin’!”
I smile, taking the five-dollar bill from his outstretched hand. “Not like that. I mean, something that could really change your life. Tip-it-upside-down kinda change.”
“Getting philosophical?” Donny slides onto the stool next to him. “Be a doll and get me a beer, Liv.”
I shoot him an annoyed look. “Aren’t you supposed to be working, boss?”
“I’m taking a break.” He smiles at me charmingly. “And my beer?”
Chewing the inside of my lip, I grab a bottle of Bud from the fridge, uncap it, and put it in front of him. “Two ninety please.”
“Are you joking?”
“No. You just put the prices up, and it’ll be my ass you chew out later when the stock and books don’t add up.”
Donny smirks and digs out a ten-dollar bill. He throws it on the bar with, “There. Put me another one in and keep the change.”
I flip him the bird. Boss or not, be an asshole, I’ll treat you like one.
Old Dill shakes his head. “What do you mean, wanted something you know is bad for you? We’re not talking beer so I’m not following.”
I sigh and lean my hip against the bar. “Okay. So, there’s this guy—”
“The one who was in here the other week?” Donny asks.
I nod. “He’s the best man at my best friend’s wedding this summer. Anyway, we’ve been spending time together. Kind of forced, kind of not. But I know he’s not good for me.”
“So dump him.” Dill shrugs.
“Really? That’s your solve-all answer? ‘Dump him’?”
“Carry on.”
“I like him. Like, I think I really like him. He’s just not good for me…emotionally.” I nibble the skin on the side of my thumb. “What do you do when you want someone and they want you but you know they’re the absolute worst thing for you?”
Both men stare at me like I’ve grown two heads. Their gazes soon turn contemplative. How do I know? They’re both gazing into their beers like that’s exactly where they’ll find their answer.
When they don’t respond after a moment, I serve someone else at the end of the bar.
“I guess the only thing you can do is to walk away. If they’re really that bad for you, you have no reason to stay,” Donny finally says.
“And if walking away would hurt as much as staying?”
Dill sips his pint. “Then you’re fucked either way, darlin’. You gotta pick the one with the happiest ending.”
“But I don’t know which one that is.”
“Then you have to guess and hope you get it right.”
Yeah, that’s exactly what I’m afraid of.
I walk out of my agent’s office with a spring in my step. Kind of. I even give Clara a smile. So it’s little bitchy, but it was nicer than the I-wish-you-were-six-feet-under glare she gave me.
Whatever.
But there’s a spring in my step and the sun is shining. It’s, like, thirty degrees, but the sun is still there.