Total pages in book: 100
Estimated words: 96249 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 481(@200wpm)___ 385(@250wpm)___ 321(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 96249 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 481(@200wpm)___ 385(@250wpm)___ 321(@300wpm)
He also seems to be frozen as he stands with his back pressed to the door he just closed. He drops his arm to his side. I tighten my hold on the pillow.
“This ain’t right, Lynn, and you know it. I can’t lose you both. Why are you shutting me out?”
“I should have been there. If I weren’t with you, I would have been there. I would have been on the side of that road to hold her flashlight while she fixed that stupid broken down truck,” I sob.
“Don’t do that. We couldn’t have known she’d break down. She should’ve called me. I would have been there. I would have helped,” he replies with so much pain in his voice, but I still can’t look at him.
“I should’ve been there. Period. Brooke was always there for me,” I shout back at him.
My heart hurts so much as I think of my sister dying on the side of that road without me. A broken sound comes from Trev, causing my eyes to snap up to his face. Tears stream down his cheeks.
“I should’ve been there,” he says. “I’m her best friend. I’ve always been there when she called.”
“She’s my sister. I should have been there. To protect her, to die with her. I should have been there.”
He drops his hat to the floor and moves to sit beside me, pulling me into his arms. I lean against him and break down. I allow him to give me the comfort I don’t deserve.
I don’t know how much time goes by as he holds me. What I do know is that it still hurts. I’ll never get to see my sister’s big, bright smile again. She’s gone.
“We can blame ourselves ’til we’re blue in the face. It’s not going to bring her back, and it won’t change the fact that that bastard was on that road driving drunk,” he murmurs into my hair.
I squeeze my eyes shut. “If I were there… I could have warned her he was coming. I could have covered her,” I whimper.
He places his fingers under my chin and turns my head until I face him. “Please, Cakes, look at me.”
I lift my eyes to his blues. He searches my face. “Brooke wouldn’t want this. She wouldn’t want you locked in here crying for days. She wouldn’t want you blaming yourself. I know it’s hard. I wake up every morning thinking of how I should’ve been following her home like I always did—”
“But you didn’t because you were with me.”
“I was where she wanted me to be. Brooke told me to go after you. She told me to be happy. She’s the reason I had the courage to tell you how I felt, how I feel. We weren’t doing anything wrong,” he says.
“And yet, we lied to my daddy,” I whisper.
“He was distraught. I couldn’t allow you to get into trouble. That one is on me. I’ll take the blame if needed.”
“Why didn’t she tell us she was leaving? Why didn’t she wait for us?”
“Because she’s Brooke. She was giving us time. She knew we wouldn’t have let her leave without us.”
I close my eyes. “I don’t know what to do from here. Everything seems wrong. Sitting at the table for a bowl of cereal. Talking on the phone, watching TV, anything she’s not here to do with me seems so wrong.”
“One of the last things your sister told me was ‘Live, love, be happy. We only live this life once.’ We should do that for her,” he says, causing me to open my eyes.
It’s there in his blue gaze. He’s going to say something to change both our lives forever. Something that my sister would have suggested. I can feel it.
“Do what?”
“Go to Paris. I already looked into it. Daddy said he’ll take care of everything. You can take her place on the trip. Well, not take her place… I… I was thinking.
“Brooke spent the last year planning this trip. She wanted to do this so bad. I have to go. I have to see those places for her. I just thought… well, I was thinking you’d want to do it with me.”
“I can’t. It was her trip,” I say softly.
“I think she would want us to go. Think about it. We could do this in her memory. Go to all the places she wanted to see. Experience it all. Maybe leave pieces of her there. You know. Like those bracelets she used to make for us.” He gives a sad smile.
He continues. “I still have those. I can bring a few to… well, we can figure that out as we go. I want to do this for her. I just thought it would be… right if we do it together.”
I draw my brows. I don’t know. It sounds so like Brooke. Wanting to make her mark on the world. This trip meant everything to her. Her room is filled with maps and an itinerary for the trip. At night, I’ve been reading her journals to feel closer to her.