Total pages in book: 83
Estimated words: 77980 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 390(@200wpm)___ 312(@250wpm)___ 260(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 77980 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 390(@200wpm)___ 312(@250wpm)___ 260(@300wpm)
“The only thing missing is Chanel.”
It was strange to see Sadie without her trademark Chanel suits, but somehow the woman radiated what Chanel meant. A strong but feminine woman who could do exactly what the men did, only she did it better.
So petite in her designer wardrobe, she now showed signs of being the woman I admired more than any woman in the world, the woman who commanded an army of men who did her bidding. Big, bad, tough guys who would take a bullet for her without being asked, including Jasper.
Especially Jasper. For all his cold, hard, ruthlessness, he was still a guy who loved his mother and would do anything to protect her.
Jasper was a walking contradiction that way. He was a bad boy to the bone, but he was also a decent man. Looking after employees and business interests on both sides of the law required a certain level of steel and ice in his veins, an unflappable demeanor, and a merciless nature that told the world that he didn’t take shit from anyone.
It made him hard-hearted, but he wasn’t a man incapable of love. No, Jasper was a man who didn’t want love, not in the traditional sense anyway.
But he would be a good father if that was what he wanted, what he chose to do with this baby. Our baby. And if fatherhood was something he wanted to be part of, I was okay with that.
I wanted more for my child, and I would do whatever I could to make sure he or she had more. Had better.
“What a mess I’ve gotten myself into, Sadie.” I continued to talk while I painted her nails, a deep burgundy shade that I always thought so at odds with her love of light, feminine colors. “You always told me to be careful with my heart, and it feels like it was the one piece of advice I didn’t pay attention to but should have.”
I didn’t know if Sadie had any idea how I felt about Jasper, and I wouldn’t be the one to tell her, but I needed to talk to someone, and the coma made her the best listener.
“I should have been more careful and guarded my heart against him as much as I did everyone else.”
I didn’t let people in, didn’t let anyone get close. I had what I would call a friendly acquaintanceship with Kat and Maisie and even Madison, but I didn’t have anyone I considered a friend.
I even shot the shit with Hulu and Terry and even the Ashby men, but whatever I once thought we were, I knew better now.
“I should have been stronger.”
Now that I was about to be a mother, I had to be even stronger. I wouldn’t struggle. That much was true—at least not financially. But I barely remember my own mother, and I didn’t know shit about being maternal and nurturing.
I would have to learn like most women did, on the job. With the resources at my disposal, I knew I’d crush being a mother the same way I’d crushed waitressing and hooking. It was all about learning what the customer—the baby in this case—needed and anticipating those needs before shit got too crazy.
Sounds easy enough, right?
I sat back and admired my handiwork for a moment, smiling as I realized just how far I’d come in this world and how much I owed to the woman in front of me.
I was just a kid in cut-off jeans and a halter top, and now I was a woman who knew the difference between natural silk and discount silk blends. I had an eye for the finer things. And most importantly, I could afford them.
“Thank you, Sadie.” The words came out unbidden, and a few tears accompanied them.
With one of her delicate hands sandwiched between mine, I gave Sadie a squeeze.
“I hope you know that I think you are the coolest, toughest woman alive, Sadie Ashby. I hope they find the asshole who did this to you and make him pay with his life. I know they will.” It was only a matter of time before they found him and made sure no one else ever would try something like this again. “I hope you wake up soon.”
I stood and left the resting woman with a silent prayer that she would wake up soon.
I needed to tell her all about her grandbaby.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
Jasper
A knock sounded on my office door early Sunday morning, and I reached for the forty caliber I kept in my desk drawer.
“What is it?” It wasn’t even noon yet, which meant there shouldn’t be anyone else inside Midnight Mass.
The door opened slowly, and where I half expected to find Mo, Agent Beck was there instead.
“Is this a good time?”
I smiled and leaned back in my plush leather chair before kicking my feet up on the desk just to fuck with a fed.