Total pages in book: 87
Estimated words: 82973 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 415(@200wpm)___ 332(@250wpm)___ 277(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 82973 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 415(@200wpm)___ 332(@250wpm)___ 277(@300wpm)
As he uncorked the wine and poured them each half a glass, her nerves began to rattle. She filled the time by snacking on a slice of cheese and an olive, then taking a swig from her stem. “What do you think we need to hash out?
What was he after? Sex? Like they had already observed, the cabin lacked entertainment…
Madison tried not to be hurt. Or angry. But screw it, if he had no compunction about using her, she would return the favor. God knew she was due since she had done without for most of her marriage to Todd.
“I want to clear up some misconceptions,” he said as she took a sip of vino. “I’ll start.”
“Why does it matter? We’re fine. Besides, with Todd and his family hanging over my head, I don’t really have a life.” And she may never have a future.
“Bullshit. It matters to me. I think what’s going on between us matters to you, too. Three years ago, you left our suite believing we had a real connection, right? It may have started with sex, but it ended up being a lot more.”
“I thought so, but I was wrong—”
“You weren’t. We did have a connection. I wanted more…but I let all the shit that happened with my dad get to me.”
Where was he going with this? Madison busied her hands by picking up a cracker, then stacking on salami and nervously downing the bite. “Someone committed suicide at his house, right?”
“His girlfriend. I didn’t tell you the whole story because I didn’t want to freak you out. The truth is, women usually leave my dad the way my mother did, crying and cursing him. Having one end her life because of him was a new low.”
Madison hadn’t seen that coming. “Oh, my god.”
“It terrified me.”
Disturbed, sure. But… “Are you saying your dad’s experience made you afraid to have a relationship with me?”
He hesitated. “After our weekend together, I questioned how much I was like him. When it comes to women, my father is domineering, verbally abusive, and manipulative. He makes sexual demands and expects his partners to comply, pushing hard and dismissing their feelings, even belittling them when they won’t blindly obey.”
She gaped. “That’s not you, Matt. You know that, right?”
He shrugged. “I’d spent my whole childhood watching my dad run roughshod over women, even my mom. Same cycle, over and over. Their emotional rape was painful. I tried to warn them, but… He’s never going to change. For the sake of family harmony, I’ve kept my opinions and disdain to a minimum.”
Her heart ached for him. “I’m sorry. But you’re not your father.”
“For a decade and a half, I was convinced I wasn’t. Sex was always light, and I made sure the fun was mutual. I was never demanding, voracious, blunt, or insatiable. Until you. Then? I was fixated, possessive, insistent, filthy—”
“None of that upset me. I liked it.” Loved it, actually. “Why didn’t you talk to me?”
Matt braced his elbows on his knees and pressed his fingertips together. “I didn’t know how. I’d never had to try to make things work with a woman. Laramie, Wyoming, isn’t a big place. Most of the local girls knew my dad’s reputation and assumed I’d be the same, so they avoided me…unless they wanted a forbidden few hours with the bad boy from the wrong side of town so they had something exciting to giggle about with their friends.”
They had used him. Hurt him. Left him. After his mother had abandoned him.
His pain made her ache to comfort him. All thoughts of using him for her pleasure and walking away evaporated. “That’s awful.”
“No more awful than guys you met in bars assuming they could take you home, coax you to put out, then ignore you the next day. But after our weekend, I worried I had too much of my dad’s DNA, and I took a big step back. By the time I realized I couldn’t simply forget you, you were in DC and dating Todd. Because you thought he wanted you…and you assumed I didn’t. ”
“You were hardly the first guy to ghost me. What was I supposed to think?”
“I was trying to protect you. When I finally wrapped my head around my feelings and worked up the courage, I called—”
“For a hookup. I remember.” And that still hurt.
“No. If we’d ended up in bed after working things out, that would have been the cherry on top. But I just wanted to explain. I wasn’t braced to hear that you were already seeing someone else.”
She raised a brow. “From what I heard, you were ‘talking’ to Hannah Jamison.”
Matt shook his head. “She was talking to me. I’d turned her down flat. I wasn’t interested.” He shrugged. “I never exchanged more than a few words with her until the night you announced your engagement. After that, I didn’t see the point of waiting for you anymore.”