Total pages in book: 62
Estimated words: 78696 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 393(@200wpm)___ 315(@250wpm)___ 262(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 78696 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 393(@200wpm)___ 315(@250wpm)___ 262(@300wpm)
She definitely didn’t need to know that I’d gone home afterwards, held a gun in my hand, and contemplated my life. Contemplated what it would be without my boy in it. Contemplated whether or not I should use that gun on myself to go join him.
I’d been so weak that night.
And when I’d woken up the next morning, after drinking myself into a dreamless, passed out stupor, I realized that I had more life left in me, at least enough to make sure I took down all those involved in my son’s murder, anyway.
Lenore wasn’t a part of that plan.
But the moment she introduced herself as Lenore, and I’d looked into her innocent eyes, then learned that her middle name was Lane, I knew I couldn’t deny my feelings for her.
Not when she shared the same middle name with my boy.
Not when I couldn’t stop thinking about her.
Not when I couldn’t sleep without waking up, wishing she was next to me.
I just hoped she’d be able to get over the fact that I couldn’t talk about Tanner.
Not yet, anyway.
It was still too raw, the wound in my heart.
It felt like I’d been shot.
The pain was a dull ache that reminded me every single second that Tanner was no longer on this earth with me.
Would never grow up to go to college.
Would never see his wife walk down the aisle towards him.
Would never hold his child in his arms and realize that his whole life was in the palm of his hands.
The ride to my ex-wife’s place was uneventful, and I took the long way, which took me over two hours out of my way
The wind was freeing to me.
Three hours of uninterrupted therapy that I desperately needed.
It helped me clear my head enough to allow me to think about what would need to be done once I reached Noreen’s place.
Hopefully Justin was there.
It was the weekend, after all.
Noreen and Justin were quite frankly the busiest people in Texas, though.
She was so busy now that she was the wife of ‘Senator Hayes’ that it was unlikely they ever had time for him.
He was my boy, my mini me.
They only ever wanted him for the photo ops.
One good thing had come out of her marrying Hayes, though. That being that Tanner and I got even closer than we’d been before, he became more mine than hers.
I loved having him with me.
It was challenging with such a demanding job, sure, but I’d give my life to have that again.
To have him wake up in the morning and ask for candy instead of cereal.
To have him refuse to go to bed, begging me for just one more show.
Pestering me relentlessly to watch Shark Week.
I’d cried last week when I saw a Shark Week teaser on TV.
This would be the first time in four years that I wouldn’t watch it twenty-four seven for a solid week.
I arrived at Noreen’s gates at the front of their estate almost before I was ready.
I hadn’t seen her since Tanner’s funeral.
I couldn’t deal with her shit on a good day, and I really didn’t want to deal with it today.
But I needed answers.
Answers that would only come if I asked the questions.
Turning the bike off, I pressed the intercom button and waited for the butler, or whatever the hell he was, to answer.
It didn’t take long.
He was always prompt.
“May I help you?” Broderick asked coolly.
“Yo’ Brody. Can you let Noreen know I’m here and would like to speak with her?” I asked him.
Broderick’s tone audibly changed within moments of hearing my voice. “Certainly, please pull around.”
I did as told, starting my bike and pulling it into the visitor’s drive that led to the front steps of Noreen’s swanky home.
Broderick opened the door as I was getting off my bike.
I grinned at him and offered him my hand.
“Hey, man. How’s it going?” I asked.
Broderick smiled at me, but I could see the same grief in his eyes that I saw in mine.
Broderick and Tanner had been thick as thieves.
Broderick had been the one watching Tanner the majority of the time that he was here, and he loved Tanner like I did.
Like a son.
And he was grieving, just like I was.
One just didn’t wake up and get over this kind of pain.
It was the kind of pain that wrapped around your heart, squeezing it so hard that you could barely breathe whenever you thought about it.
And I could tell we were both thinking the same thing in that moment.
That we missed Tanner.
That we’d give anything to have him in between us like it used to be when I’d come over to pick him up or drop him off.
“Mr. and Mrs. Hayes are to be leaving shortly,” he looked over his shoulder. “They’re going to a social function.”
His voice held anger.
Anger was something I was used to.
I’d harbored my anger, weaving it around me like a web of protection in hopes that it would get me through the day.
Most of the time it worked…but sometimes it didn’t.
“I won’t be long,” I said, offering him my hand.
He took it, nodding.
“They’re in the front room,” he said, squeezing my hand in commiseration before I walked past him.
My heart ached when I stepped inside and didn’t’ see my boy barreling toward me.
Something that had happened every time I entered this house without him.
He’d run to me, a huge smile on his face, as he screamed that he’d missed me.
“What are you doing here, Griff?” Noreen asked.
I ran my hand through my hair, letting it settle on the back of my neck, while I contemplated my shoes and got my thoughts in order to reply to her question.
“I need to talk to you and your husband,” I said.
Her eyes narrowed. “We’re to be at a function in about an hour.”
I could tell.
She was wearing a black cocktail dress that made her look like an uppity bitch from New York instead of a senator’s wife.
“I don’t really care what you have to do,” I said, passing her to enter the sitting room where they always received their guests. “I need to talk to you today. Right now to be specific.”