Total pages in book: 28
Estimated words: 26471 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 132(@200wpm)___ 106(@250wpm)___ 88(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 26471 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 132(@200wpm)___ 106(@250wpm)___ 88(@300wpm)
She’s silent for several beats and I can practically hear her thinking. “Bobby, I want to be with you. I want to come home. But you have to compromise.” She takes a breath. “Kandice and Becca are taking a trip to Atlantic City this weekend and I…I want to go with them. Alone.”
“Not a fucking chance.”
Mandy tenses and tries to struggle out of my arms, but I don’t allow it. I can’t. My muscles have quite simply frozen in place at the thought of her in Atlantic City without me. It’s my nightmare. The men, the loosened inhibitions, the party atmosphere.
“Why don’t you just ask me to light myself on fire, Mandy?” I growl against her mouth. “That would be easier.”
“I have to have independence,” she says, breathless, her eyes still shining with moisture. “I need to have friends and a personal life, Bobby. If you can’t give me that, I’m not going to be happy. I’m going to leave again.”
“You said you wouldn’t. You agreed you’d come home to stay.”
“We both know you didn’t come by that promise fairly.”
My heart is being ripped in eight directions. “Mandy. You’re killing me.”
“Agree to let me go on the trip.” She looks me in the eye. “If you can handle that, I’ll believe you can change.” She kisses my mouth softly. “For us. For our forever.”
Forever.
That word is magic when it comes to her. I want forever with her so bad, I would bathe in blood and swim with sharks, if I thought a life with her was on the other side.
“For the record, I trust you. It’s everyone else that makes me want to—”
“Lock me up?” She shakes her head slowly. “You can’t.”
I beg to differ, but looking into her eyes, I know she’s not going to budge. Worse, she’s going to be miserable if I don’t find a way to compromise. To give her some freedom. Tears in her eyes are almost enough to slay me on the spot. I couldn’t handle her being miserable because of me. There’s only one thing to do. Allow her some space.
Or…at least the perception of it.
“Okay,” I say hoarsely. “Go on your trip.”
I’ll see you there.
eight
Mandy
“Guys, I don’t know about this dress…”
I barely have a chance to finish my sentence before Kandice and Becca drag me from the hotel room, nearly causing me to trip in my ice pick heels. On the way out of the room, I catch sight of myself in the bathroom mirror and do a double take. I don’t even recognize myself.
On the way down the carpeted corridor, my heart starts to pump faster.
There is a hotel room door ajar to my left, revealing a party inside. Smoke billows out into our paths and two men turn to leer at us. Kandice and Becca don’t seem concerned about this at all. They laugh and race to the elevator in their sequined mini dresses. I barely make it in behind them before the steel doors snap shut.
“Oh my God, I can’t wait to dance!” Kandice sighs.
“It was such a good idea to pregame with the mini-bar,” Becca says, checking her pout in the mirrored wall of the elevator. “At least some of us did.”
They both look at me pointedly. “I just wanted to save myself for the club.”
Eye rolls from both girls.
It’s finally time to admit this trip was a huge mistake. I’m uncomfortable. I’m the odd one out, as usual, but unlike the other times, I can’t simply go home. I’m stuck here—five hours away from Boston. I brought a modest skirt and comfortable shoes to wear, but Kandice and Becca refused to let me put them on. Instead, they dressed me in a tight, red mini dress—without a bra—put some product in my hair to make it look wild and painted my mouth a deep crimson.
This hotel/casino is not what I pictured while driving to Atlantic City. It’s kind of seedy and rundown. Smoky, dark and half-empty, like it has definitely seen better days. And the fact that Kandice and Becca seem reluctant to include me in their conversations makes me wish I’d stayed in Boston. Even if we’re only here for one night, it suddenly seems like too much.
Every single cell in my body cries out for Bobby.
I feel naked and exposed without him.
I’m sure that separation response isn’t healthy, but that logic doesn’t stop me from feeling the yearning any deeper. If he was holding my hand right now, there is nothing I would fear. I’d be confident. I’d feel like I belonged.
The elevator doors open and I’m hustled into a marble foyer. A group of young people stand in a group, dressed a lot like us. Probably headed to the same night club, which is located on the lobby level, at the rear of the casino. One of the young men—a man in a purple polo shirt and gold chain—winks at me as I pass and convulsion strikes me all the way down to my toes. I’m suddenly very aware that I’m going to be in a club with dozens, maybe hundreds, of men who are there to socialize with members of the opposite sex…