Total pages in book: 159
Estimated words: 144433 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 722(@200wpm)___ 578(@250wpm)___ 481(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 144433 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 722(@200wpm)___ 578(@250wpm)___ 481(@300wpm)
The last five days have been the longest in my life, longer even than those first few awful days when I found myself in the glassed-in alien enclosure, treated like an exotic lizard of some kind. I thought those uncertain, confusing days were awful, but it's nothing compared to the worry I've felt ever since Zhur left. I've bitten my nails to the quick. I haven't slept a wink. I've survived on night tea and sheer stubbornness while waiting to hear back on Zhur's plan.
Did I ever think that I'd just go back to my normal life once he left? Ha. Ha twice. I'm an idiot. I miss Zhur. I miss having someone to argue with, or to just chat about the day. Salvotor provides conversation, sure, but we're not on the same wavelength. Zhur and I just clicked on some deeper level, once we got past the initial bickering. I miss him. I miss puttering around the house with him. I miss waking up with his big body next to mine.
I'm constantly wondering what he's up to. If he's all right.
If he misses me.
If his brother murdered him the moment he showed up for the parlay. The not knowing is the worst part of all of this.
I want to be furious that Salvotor knew there was a message earlier, but he's easily distracted. He's utterly delighted with farm life, and I've never seen a person so happy to be around animals. He's constantly wanting to feed them, pet them, take them for walks. I haven't yet pointed out to him that they're going to be meat. I think it might break him. He probably got the message earlier this morning, and then some cow wandered past and he ran off to pet it. He really does have good intentions. I think.
Flinging the door shut behind me, I skid across the floors and slam to a halt in front of the comm panel. Alien characters flash across the screen and I slap at buttons, because I can't remember which one involves message retrieval. "Come on," I mutter, tapping one key and then another. "Gimme the goods."
"Retrieving," the computer says, and then Zhur's face is on the screen.
Sort of. It's not the Zhur I'm used to seeing. All the orange has been bleached out of his fur, and he's snowy white again. I bite back a gasp at the sight, devouring his appearance. His mane looks good, I decide. It's been cut evenly and worked into a style of some kind, and it shines with good health. There are no bruises or cuts on his face, and the clothing he wears is severe, but clean. His hands are clasped behind his back and his chest is out, his shoulders back. He looks stiff and proper and entirely unlike my Zhur.
He looks like the Zhur that landed here initially.
"I am sending this message out to...the friend that assisted me."
"Friend, huh?" I mutter, resisting the urge to touch the screen. It won't bring me closer to him.
"I can reassure you that I am safe, and my plan was a success. The wedding has been temporarily delayed. In a few days, I will make a public statement, and from there, I will go on to a safe, protected place to live out my life in exile. Please know that I am well..." He clears his throat, his stiff expression twitching. "...and I will not be returning to you. I am sending this message on with the crew of the Scarlet Gaze in the hopes they will pass it on. Rest assured your identity has been kept secret. You will be unaffected by any of this."
Unaffected? How can he think I'm unaffected? My stomach hurts, and my hands are gripped tight in the front of my tunic, because if I don't hold onto something, I might collapse. This is the answer I wanted, right?
So why does it feel all wrong?
Zhur's expression twitches, and then his gaze drops. My stomach drops, too. When he looks up, his eyes are soft.
"I shouldn't say this, but...I will miss you."
CHAPTER
ONE HUNDRED FOURTEEN
MAEVE
"I will miss you."
Zhur's words are like a punch to the diaphragm. All of the air leaves my lungs and I can't breathe.
"My time spent in your presence was..." His mouth lifts in the tiniest of smiles. "A highlight. I will not miss the food or the smells of the place, but I will miss the company." Zhur's voice grows even softer. "Very much. Every day with you was a joy, though it might not have seemed like it. I know that I complained sometimes, but...I have no regrets. I would do it all again, a hundred times over."
There's a pause, and then he looks down.
"I have attempted to speak to my brother about his bride, but it goes very poorly. I will not give up on my attempts, but I regret that I must disappoint you. Rem will not be budged. Please understand that I tried."