Total pages in book: 78
Estimated words: 77309 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 387(@200wpm)___ 309(@250wpm)___ 258(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 77309 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 387(@200wpm)___ 309(@250wpm)___ 258(@300wpm)
“I am home, remember?” I let that linger for a second. “You paid off my mortgage because you wanted us to be equals. Well, trust me like an equal and respect my wishes. I just need some space.”
“Isabel—”
“Please,” I say, fighting back the lump in my throat. “Just let me think, okay?”
He stares at me. I can see the hurt in his eyes and it kills me. Conlan’s never cared about a woman before, at least in the years that I’ve known him, but I know he carries a scar deep inside of him. A wound that won’t heal. Like he’s constantly drowning.
I know doing this won’t help.
But I don’t know how I can ever trust him. Right when our budding relationship was just starting to flourish, I find out that he kept something important for me for his own selfish reasoning. How can I trust him now, when he proved that he’ll do whatever he wants, whenever he wants it?
“I’ll go,” he says, taking a step back. “But I want you to hear this first. I never meant to hold anything back. I should’ve told you right away, but I was worried that it wouldn’t pan out. It wasn’t until today that my brother said everything had officially blown over. I don’t want to lose this, but I also won’t force it on you. I meant what I said. If you want to stay here, I won’t force you to leave. Just know that I’m thinking about you, and I’m waiting for you to come home.”
He turns away. I’m tempted to reach out and draw him back. I want to say his name, run out into the rain, kiss him hard.
Instead, I watch him retreat up the driveway to the street. He gets into the back of a town car and slowly pulls away. The headlights recede, and then he’s gone.
I turn back to my house, the place where I grew up, the place where I watched my father slowly die while I couldn’t do anything to stop it. The ghosts still haunt me, and they always will. My failures live on here, which is maybe why I can’t get away. They hold me back, hold me down.
I close the door and lock the bold before trudging up the steps to my bath, feeling even worse than I had before.
Chapter 35
Isabel
I start looking for a job over the next few days.
Even if my mortgage is paid off, I still have bills, groceries, all that awful grown-up stuff.
It doesn’t escape me that technically, Conlan owes me a lot of money right now, but the thought of going back there and making him pay me feels way worse than being completely broke.
I go out and look for a freaking job.
I’m not exactly qualified for a whole lot, but having Conlan’s name on my resume helps. I apply to everything that looks remotely interesting, whether I’m technically qualified or not, figuring it can’t hurt to try. I spend mornings and afternoons on job boards, scrolling through all those job websites, and in the evenings, I drive around town looking for Help Wanted signs. There’s a diner not far away that seems interested, but otherwise, I can’t find much.
At night, I take long baths, read romance novels, and think about my former boss, wondering what he’s doing and how the Lincoln’s going.
Above all, I question all my decisions up to this point.
Wondering, did I overreact? He kept something away from me, but he claims it was to make sure I didn’t get my hopes up. Do I believe that?
I have to remember it’s not about the one lie—it’s about the years of lies leading up to this point.
People don’t change. Conlan isn’t going to shapeshift into a totally different man overnight. If he’s going to change, I have to give him time.
I have to hope he’ll get there on his own.
Which is why I don’t reach out, even though I want to.
On the fourth day, someone knocks on my door at nine in the morning.
I half expect a delivery driver, but I haven’t been buying anything. On account of being broke and all that.
Instead of Amazon, Allison Leyland stands on my porch with a suitcase and a massive smile.
“Hey, girl,” she says. “I got in a fight with Daddy. Can I crash here?”
My mouth opens in shock. She is the last person in the entire world I expected. “I thought you were in New York.”
“I was, at least until I hopped on a plane last night and flew out here.” She stifles a yawn. “Stupid red-eye flights. I can’t ever fall asleep, you know? Not without some intense medication, but Daddy confiscated my stash. Seriously, can I sleep on your floor or something?”
I want to say no. She’s the last thing I need right now. Allison is a jolt of chaos wherever she goes—but I can’t turn down a homeless teenager, even if she is a pain in my ass.