Total pages in book: 73
Estimated words: 69413 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 347(@200wpm)___ 278(@250wpm)___ 231(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 69413 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 347(@200wpm)___ 278(@250wpm)___ 231(@300wpm)
I stood there, proud, wishing I could cry.
I was so happy for Chase and Adam that I could feel it in my bones, but the tears wouldn’t come. Had something truly broken inside me for good a year ago?
As the ceremony continued, Marianne reached over to grab my hand. I held hers, and we watched as Adam and Chase read each other their vows.
It was everything I used to want so badly. And now, I just felt numb.
After they were declared married and kissed, the room rang out with applause. It had gone by in a flash, and as the wedding party left the room, Marianne cheered. Some tension inside me released, knowing I wouldn’t have to be trapped in this beautiful ballroom with my ex, the sweet person I’d hurt earlier today, and myself.
“Now it’s time for the best part,” she leaned over and said to me. “Cocktail hour, then party time. And I do plan on having a good time tonight.”
I smiled, grateful for her company. I nodded once. “I’m ready to party, too. I’ll walk over with you.”
I accompanied her down the hallway to the bar lounge. Cocktail hour was being held here, and for the first time all week, the big, wooden double doors at the far end of the lounge were wide open, revealing a hall set up with tables, a dance floor, and more flowers and twinkly lights than I’d ever seen in one place.
It was stunning. Floor-to-ceiling windows covered the walls in the reception hall, with some of the most beautiful views of the mountains I’d ever seen.
“Isn’t that magical?” Marianne mused. “It’s like a dream.”
“No kidding.”
“Oh! There’s Helen and Jennifer. I have to go say hello,” she told me. She turned back to me, squeezing my hand. “Thank you for your company, Landry. And remember, don’t ever close your heart to love. That’s some southern, old-lady wisdom for you, and you won’t regret it.”
I squeezed her hand back. “You’re a joy, Marianne. I’ll find you later on the dance floor.”
She nodded sharply, her hat dipping. “You better believe it,” she said. “I never miss a chance to dance. Bye now.”
She floated off to greet her friends and I leaned over the bar, which was one big, round oak circle at the center of the room. I got a whiskey on the rocks and leaned back, letting my eyes close as I took the first sip.
I felt a hand on my shoulder and when I turned, I saw Jamie’s face.
He looked better than ever. His outfit for the wedding was a perfectly fitted slate grey suit, one that brought out the blue of his eyes like they were two oceans against a storm. The faint dusting of freckles atop each of his cheeks was enough to pull me back under his spell.
A whirl of agonizing longing hit my heart, so quickly that it made my chest ache. In another world, I’d have done anything to be with someone like Jamie. He felt like a home away from home for me here.
I cleared my throat. “Thought you’d be avoiding me all night,” I told him gently.
His expression was serious. “I’m sorry,” he said simply, his eyes searching my face. “I was unreasonable earlier, and I know it. You don’t have to talk to me again, but know that I truly am sorry. For everything.”
“I’m the one who should be sorry,” I managed to say.
For the entire wedding ceremony, I’d been waiting for the moment when I’d start to cry, start to feel anything deeply at all.
And yet now here with Jamie in front of me, I felt as if every emotion was brewing right below my surface, threatening to blow up like a volcano.
No, this is just how you always used to feel, I chided myself. Falling for anybody who gives you affection.
But I didn’t know if that was even true. I’d been given a ton of affection, adoration, and attempts at something serious from random other guys over the past year—and I had never wanted more from any of them.
Jamie wasn’t just “anybody,” it turned out.
“Let’s be friends?” Jamie finally asked. “For real, this time?”
He held out a hand and after a split second’s pause, I reached out to shake it. Even that contact made me want to pull him in close and cover him with kisses.
“Let’s be friends,” I agreed.
Friends was what I’d wanted so badly, all along. So why didn’t it feel like enough now?
The dark box that I’d been stuffed in all year—that I’d stuffed every old hope and desire and feeling in after having my heart shattered—was starting to dissolve, bit by bit. It sent me into a quiet panic, as if everything inside of me wanted to keep that box firmly locked and stowed away.
But the box was slowly opening, with each moment I spent around Jamie.