Total pages in book: 129
Estimated words: 121764 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 609(@200wpm)___ 487(@250wpm)___ 406(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 121764 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 609(@200wpm)___ 487(@250wpm)___ 406(@300wpm)
But if I was being completely honest with myself, I’d felt a spark that first night I met Jaxson Brittain. And the fire had only grown more intense with every second — like it was a wild one, eating up an entire forest and laughing at the helicopters dumping buckets of water on it.
Insatiable.
That’s how I felt when it came to that man.
“My bet is this is just what you need,” Livia said. “A few weeks of fun, and then you go your separate ways. And no one needs to know.”
“Least of all your brother,” Maven said, looking a bit green.
My mouth felt particularly dry as I searched the fairway for the rest of our crew. I found Will Perry talking to my mom and dad first, and then, standing next to a golf cart — my brother, Carter, and Jaxson.
It was stupid how delicious he looked in fucking golfing attire. Something about those gray, well-fitted pants made his ass even more tempting, and I didn’t know a baby blue polo tucked into them would do things to me the way it did. The clothes battled with his messy hair, with the ink sprawled out over his skin. It was the most mesmerizing contradiction.
“And what if it’s already over?” I asked, my voice quiet.
“Then you have to respect that,” Maven said. “If he’s thought about it today and decided it’s not worth the risk… well…”
Livia sucked her teeth. “I would bet my year’s salary on that not being the case. But, if it is, then continue the road trip on your own. That’s what you want to do, anyway, right? Travel? See the world?” She waved me off. “Jaxson Brittain is just a pit stop. Enjoy him while you have him, but then leave him in your rearview mirror.”
“What happened to all that sappy love shit you were hitting me with when I was trying to leave Vince in my rearview mirror?” Maven asked, crossing her arms and arching a brow at her best friend.
“Please,” Livia said with a scoff. “You were so gone for that boy I was about to have to start forwarding your mail. And I was going to go insane if you didn’t figure your shit out.”
Maven tacked on something else, and then they were laughing and reminiscing while I stared at Jaxson from across the green, willing him to look at me.
He didn’t.
The fireworks show started, and I knew I was in deeper trouble than I’d ever admit when a part of me longed for Jaxson to be able to hold me the way my brother came over to hold Maven. I wondered what it would be like to smile up at him as he pulled me under his arm, to kiss him as the bright light flashed across the sky.
My stomach was in knots by the time I climbed into my parents’ rental car under the pretense that I was flying out tonight. Mom and Dad prattled on and on about Vince the entire way, though Mom at least had the decency to ask me where I was off to next when we pulled up to the airport.
“Wherever the wind blows me,” I answered with a smile that felt more forced than ever.
Mom and Dad both got out with me, Dad grabbing my luggage while Mom wrapped me in a hug.
“I’m so proud of you,” she said, squeezing me tight. “My little adventurer, taking the world by storm. I never have to worry about you.”
My chest tightened. I wanted to believe her, but I couldn’t imagine what she could possibly be proud of — that I’d scraped by with Cs in college and earned a degree? That I’d cashed in my trust as soon as they let me and was living off it rather than a salary? That I was technically homeless?
I couldn’t bring myself to ask her — because I was scared I’d have to watch her falter and look at my father with panic in her eyes. She’d silently ask him to bail her out, and he would, because my father always knew what to say.
The other part of my sinking gut was spawned by that last sentence she’d said. I never have to worry about you.
What if I wanted someone to worry about me?
Mom climbed back into the car after making me promise to update her on my next stop, and then Dad pulled me in for his signature bear hug, a deep sigh leaving his chest.
“Be good,” he said.
I pulled back with a smile, doing a little finger-gun dance. “Come on, Dad — do you even know me? I’m always great.”
He tapped me on the chin. “That you are. My little ray of sunshine.”
I beamed under the praise even though it felt like a lie, and with a quick kiss on his cheek, he loaded into the car, and they were gone.