Total pages in book: 88
Estimated words: 82651 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 413(@200wpm)___ 331(@250wpm)___ 276(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 82651 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 413(@200wpm)___ 331(@250wpm)___ 276(@300wpm)
But that didn’t seem to appease him. So he stripped me, then himself, and planted me on his lap in the bed. He ordered me to ride him hard and I’ve been doing so for several minutes. I’ve been on the verge of an orgasm, but I’ve been holding off, wanting us to come together.
He’s not giving it to me, though.
I can’t figure out if maybe my shine is indeed wearing off, he’s pissed at his game play, or maybe he just can’t concentrate right now.
Regardless, my sexual esteem is at an all-time low right now and I have the first moment of doubt in my ability to maintain a relationship with Van.
This is deepened when with a snarl of frustration he pushes me off his cock and flips me over. He jerks me up to my hands and knees and drives himself deep into me from behind, our flesh cracking hard against each other.
And yes, fuck yes, it feels good. Van pulling out slowly just to punch back in with almost a brutal focus. No dirty words or soft praises. He grunts every time he bottoms out, sucking in air when he pulls back. His fingers dig into my hips, and I know he’s taking out his anger and frustration on my body.
He doesn’t know it, but he’s taking it out on my heart too, but I will bear that silently. He doesn’t need to know that he’s slightly hurting my feelings right now. What he needs is a release, and then he needs to let me hold him.
I’m convinced of it.
So Van fucks me from behind, sharing nothing with me but a powerful hip action so he hits me deep. His grip on my hips is to hold me still, not to caress, and he doesn’t say a word to me.
I bear this as well, and figure this might actually be the first time that Van comes that he doesn’t get me there first. But then to my surprise, he curls his body over my back, bringing one hand to my clit. His grunts turn into soft groans as he fucks me a little slower, playing with that one spot that will absolutely get me where he wants me to go.
When I get close and start to tighten up, and he can always tell when I suck in that last big breath before I explode, he starts hammering at me again. My hope and faith is restored when Van growls out my name with his climax and only as I start to come apart first.
Van figured out how to get us there together, and that was clearly important to him.
Yes…this gives me great hope.
After our heart rates calm, and Van situates us in the bed so that he’s spooned around me, I ask him hesitantly, “You okay?”
I don’t think he’s going to give me much, as he’s quiet for what seems like ages, but then his arms tighten around me. “Just got a lot on my mind. Sorry that wasn’t the greatest sex we’ve had.”
I can’t help it, but I burst out laughing. I can almost feel the offense in his body as I turn in his arms so I can look at him, and yes…he’s offended that I’m laughing.
“Jesus, Van,” I chide softly. “If you don’t think that was great sex, and that’s bad sex with you, then I’m okay with us having bad sex the rest of our days.”
“I was rough,” he points out.
“I love it rough,” I remind him, and then I press the front of my body close to his, pushing my face into his neck. “Now…want to talk about what’s on your mind?”
“Do I really need to?” he asks. “You’re like the most intuitive woman I know. I’m sure you have me figured out.”
He’s giving me an opening. He’s allowing me to explain all the ways in which his head is fucked up right now.
But I don’t need to. He knows what’s wrong, and I know what’s wrong, so all I do is validate him. “You have plenty of things on your mind, and I’m pretty sure I know what they are and how they rank in order of importance. Want to talk about any of them?”
I wait for him to say no, because that’s what I expect out of this stoic man, and I’m okay with that. I’m even ready to lighten the mood with a joke, or perhaps I can tease his body back to life for round two.
Instead he surprises me with, “I want to know how it went with Etta today. It’s important to me that you two get along.”
There have been a few times over the past week that Van has made my heart clench with pure emotion, but nothing he’s done has made me feel this way. I can feel my entire being just melt with absolute joy that that is what weighs the heaviest on him right now.