Total pages in book: 95
Estimated words: 91864 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 459(@200wpm)___ 367(@250wpm)___ 306(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 91864 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 459(@200wpm)___ 367(@250wpm)___ 306(@300wpm)
Ethan stood in a circle of Dad’s friends, laughing as Dad talked the group’s ears off, probably telling them some joke he’d already told at a number of these barbecues. Dad was the kind of guy who could have told a story as many times as he wanted and everyone would have been just as interested, just as amused, because each time had its own special feeling to it…and his eagerness about sharing was almost as rewarding as the story itself.
“I get it,” Mom said, her eyes on me.
“Get what? I haven’t said anything.”
“You’ve said more than you realize. I’m happy for you, Sean.”
“Happy for me? You’re making way too big of a deal out of—”
“Out of this guy who means nothing but just happened to be willing to come to the family barbecue with you? Okay, if you say so. I’ll assume there’s absolutely nothing going on between you and Straighty.” I glared at her, which provoked, “Oh, if I didn’t know better, I’d think you were fourteen, and I just grounded you.”
“I hardly even know what’s going on here.”
“I think you might have a little clue about what’s going on. Serious-Mom time…I’ve never butted into your private life, but I have to admit there’s always been a part of me that’s been worried that because of what happened with Brady, you have maybe, not let yourself get as close to people. Or that you’re nervous about what might happen if you do.”
“That might have been true in the past, but I certainly haven’t been using that as an excuse to push Ethan away.”
Her eyes were filled with knowing—a really annoying knowing. Like she could see so much more than I wanted her to. “I’m glad to hear that, Sean. After all, I’m sitting here waiting for you to adopt three or four grandchildren for me.”
“Oh my God. Here I thought you were having serious-Mom time.”
“This is serious-Mom time.” But I could read the amusement all over her expression…how much she was enjoying getting to me. “I just hope you remember that you have to cling on to the things in this world that are important to you. And the people.”
Her eyes watered, and I knew it was because she was thinking about Brady.
“I won’t ever forget that.”
“Okay, good,” she said as a tear fell from her eye.
I wiped it away. “Oh, no. Now you have me worrying about you.”
“Don’t worry about me. I wear waterproof mascara.” She winked and forced a smile. “Now give your mom a hug and then get out there and rescue your man from your father.”
I wrapped my arms around her, holding her close, before I helped her with the casserole. I took it to the picnic table on the porch.
Mom was right. Not just about having to cling to the things that are important, but about my interest in Ethan.
It was clear I liked him a hell of a lot—as more than just some fuck buddy, and it was more than just our connection with his parents and my brother. He was a cool, fun guy who I liked spending time with. And what we’d shared even within the past twenty-four hours, when he bottomed for the first time, had felt so intimate, like so much more than anything I’d ever experienced with anyone else. There was a closeness between us that was too strong to deny, and even though there was something scary about it, it was something I wanted to explore with him.
But the real question was: did he want that?
Surely he did. After all, he wasn’t fighting what we were doing either. Hell, he fucking listened to me ramble about my brother at four in the morning. He could have run from this barbecue, but he hadn’t.
While one of my mom’s neighbors began giving me the third degree about my career and how I was doing, I watched Ethan over her shoulder, chatting away with one of Dad’s friends. He turned to me, and we exchanged a gaze, and as he smiled, it assured me that what was happening between us wasn’t in my head.
When I was finished catching up with a few of Mom and Dad’s friends, I finally made it back to Dad and Ethan. We chatted some before Dad insisted on showing Ethan the garden. Dad gave him the standard tour, and as Ethan reached the middle of the garden, standing on a wooden beam, surrounded by squash and cucumbers, he said, “This is fairly impressive, Johnnie.”
“It’s been a family project for a while now. Gave me something to do after I retired. I need to keep busy. My mind needs to be working all the time.”
“I know the feeling,” Ethan said. “I have a hard time shutting it off sometimes because I keep it going so much.”