Total pages in book: 130
Estimated words: 123579 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 618(@200wpm)___ 494(@250wpm)___ 412(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 123579 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 618(@200wpm)___ 494(@250wpm)___ 412(@300wpm)
I’ve wanted this for weeks; since I saw him that first night, and now that he’s about to give me everything I wanted, I’m the one hesitating. I’m hesitating because it has to be right. My first experience with sex was brutal and against my will. It took a long time and a lot of therapy for me to try it again, and I discovered I love it. Love it so much I’ve been reckless with it in the past, but this means too much. He means too much for me to be reckless with an intimacy I know will mean more to me than anything ever has. I already feel closer to him than to any man before.
“Are you sure?”
He laughs against my neck, nudging the strap of my dress away from my shoulder with his chin and kissing the naked skin.
“Very.” His hands come up to cup my face, and he parts my lips, dipping inside, possessing me sweetly, then harder and deeper with every brush of our tongues. I strain against him, moaning into his mouth, drawing his tongue in deeper.
“What’s different?” I ask against his soft lips. “Why now?”
“Why are you hesitating?” His breath comes heavy as he pulls away the other strap of my dress until it gives way, falling to my waist, baring my breasts to him. His knuckles whisper over my nipples, and my knees almost buckle. I lean into him for support.
“Because…” I swallow, struggling to focus. “Because I want it to be right between us. It means too much not to be.”
He leans down to whisper in my ear.
“That’s why now.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
Trevor
I didn’t plan this. I didn’t think it would be tonight, but now, hearing her wrestle with whether she’s good enough for me, I know it should be. It has to be. Even though things were undeniably awkward with Fleur present, I loved having Sofie at my side tonight. Everything is richer and brighter with her. Awards and honors don’t do much for me anymore. It’s never been why I do the things I do, but my chest stuck out like a peacock’s accepting that award tonight because she was there. Because she saw me receive it.
I loved seeing her in my world. It made me realize how much I want to keep here there, and even though her life is about to become a giant clusterfuck after this meeting about Manchester tomorrow, I want to be in it with her. No matter what. If I try to put this into words, I’ll screw it up. I’ll scare her away. I’ll freak her the fuck out. But if I tell her with my body—with my hands, with my mouth, with any part of me that can reach any part of her—she’ll know.
“Take me to your bedroom.” I leave the breath-wrapped words, half plea, half command, in the fragile shell of her ear.
She looks up at me, and if it were anyone but Sofie, I’d swear her eyes are shy. The bodice of her dress hangs around her hips, and she crosses her arms over her breasts. Her eyes flit from me to the floor, then back up and around her apartment.
“You’re sure?” She tucks the fullness of her bottom lip between her teeth.
I didn’t think it would be like this. I’m not dumb or blind or stupid. I’ve known for weeks this is what she wants, and I can barely walk straight every time we’re in a room together, so she must know how much I want it, too. I just wanted it to be the right time; when it would mean as much to her as it would to me.
And now it does.
I’m glad we waited and didn’t just one-night-stand our way to something less than this will be. I turn her in the direction I know leads to her bedroom, pressing my chest to her naked back, crossing my arms across her waist and walking her down the hall. Her small steps forward are driving me crazy because I can’t wait to unwrap this gift I’ve been saving. I content myself with nibbles at her neck and kisses across her shoulders until we enter her darkened bedroom.
She walks ahead of me, using one arm to turn on the lamp and one arm to cover her breasts. Is this the girl who posed for Playboy? The one who, without blinking, autographs the copies horny boys thrust in her face? If they could see her now. Actually, I’d want to gouge out the eyes of anyone who saw her now. Not just the half-naked perfection of her body, but the vulnerability of her eyes in these moments before I take her and she takes me. I want this just for me and just for her. These are the most intimate moments of my life and we still have our clothes on.