Total pages in book: 148
Estimated words: 142939 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 715(@200wpm)___ 572(@250wpm)___ 476(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 142939 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 715(@200wpm)___ 572(@250wpm)___ 476(@300wpm)
It was, after all, Vane’s family who created a telescope that overpowered the Hubble. Now we have the Bartow Space Scope that fucks with my mind. Just as much as Vane does himself.
I prefer to be grounded. Well, not really, but I do want to remain here on earth and stay in current time. I’m not trying to understand time travel. That’s not something you can wrap your hands around—or maybe I could with Vane, but it’s the biology that gets me. A human can’t move quickly enough to go back into time. You’d die. I know that much. Then again, what if—
“Liberty,” Vane saying my name jerks me back to reality. If this is, in fact, reality. It sure as heck doesn’t feel like it at the moment.
“Am I awake? Is this real?” I smack the countertop, making Felix jump. “Sorry!” I apologize immediately to my new furry friend.
“Real?” Vane smirks.
He flips off the stove before moving toward me. I should scoot away from him, but instead, my feet remain planted where they are. Likely because I’m in virtual reality, and he’s pinned them to the ground.
Why else would I let him draw closer? It’s not like I want that in any way. I don’t. Definitely not. His hand cups my cheek before he presses his mouth against mine in a gentle kiss. It’s only a brush of his lips.
“Nothing has ever been more real in my life.” Vane’s words make my chest grow tight.
His hand slips from my cheek to grip my chin in a firm hold. I should smack him away, but I don't. Obviously, this isn’t real. Nor is the feeling of my entire body being on fire from him being so close.
Vane Bartow is kissing me and declaring me to be his wife. I bet whatever he shot me up with earlier hasn’t worn off yet, and I’m imagining this entire scenario. Well, I might as well enjoy it for a little while.
“Open,” he orders.
I obey.
Don’t judge me. I can’t help myself. There is something about him taking control that melts me in a way I’ve never felt before. It’s freeing, which is insane because I’m his captive and he’s clearly crazy. Like totally insane.
His tongue slips into my mouth. At first it’s slow, trying to lure me in. It works. Vane has a way of doing that to me. I’m a moth to his flame. It’s why from the second I met him, he scared the hell out of me. My mind would dream of what could be with him. That’s all it would ever be. Because dreams don’t come true. It doesn't matter how hard you try to make them real. That’s not how people work. I’ve determined that dreams are stupid. I hated that late at night they would creep into my mind. And that Vane would be the star of them when I could be thinking about something else.
The reality is that no one ever picked me. Rebel and Magic were my family, but they have other families. I don’t. Even though they are all I have, at times I find myself pushing away from them. Scared that I’ll become too much and then what? Well, I know what happens after that. When people are overwhelmed by you, they pass you on to someone else. And even though I know Rebel and Magic would never do that to me, the thought still creeps into my mind. I can tell myself they’ll stay over and over again, but still I can’t fight the need to run.
I’m always alone. I hate myself for how jealous I am of what they have. They should both be happy. I would never dare try and take that from them. It’s why I kept quiet about how I’ve been feeling. I didn’t want them to pull back from what they found. I wouldn’t want to.
Both of them knew what love was. They got it from their family. I have no clue how it would be to fall for someone. It has to be different from how I felt with Magic and Rebel. I didn’t know that until I watched them fall into a different kind of love. Both of them are brilliant. You couldn’t fool them into love. The way it consumed them, I knew it had to be real. It also showed me that I’ve never had that in my life.
Being that far gone for someone is such a foreign thing to me. I can’t imagine opening myself up that much. Too many homes had rejected me. In the end, people find my quirks cute or fascinating, but also wearing.
The only people who ever wanted me outside of Magic and Rebel were people that wanted to use me. Buffy was one of them. It wasn’t me that they wanted. All they cared about was what my mind could do for them. It’s ironic. I love machines. They’re my whole life, but I’ve turned myself into one for people to use.