Total pages in book: 73
Estimated words: 73192 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 366(@200wpm)___ 293(@250wpm)___ 244(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 73192 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 366(@200wpm)___ 293(@250wpm)___ 244(@300wpm)
His smile was warm and luckily, he didn’t hear his mother and Rome fighting because he was too busy focusing on me.
“Daddy loves you,” the little boy said.
I swallowed.
A four-year-old wasn’t supposed to be so intelligent, philosophical.
He also wasn’t supposed to look like this, either.
Where I’d never seen little kids his age sitting still, Matias was so small and frail that he literally couldn’t even lift his head off the pillow.
But, goddamn, his smile was beautiful.
“You’re a smart little boy, aren’t you?” I asked, sounding proud.
God, what had I done?
“Daddy says it’s because I don’t move around much. Since I don’t have energy to do anything, I can sit here and use my brain. He also says I take after you. That you were always smart,” Matias said.
I felt like I’d been hammered in the gut by Rome’s fist.
He’d done that more than once while he and I were fighting. I remembered it like it was yesterday, the fight we’d gotten into and the fist I’d taken to the stomach right before I’d landed a blow to Rome’s kidney.
It’d been brutal—and over a fuckin’ truck that we both wanted to buy.
The feeling in my stomach felt exactly like that.
All the breath had whooshed from my lungs and I couldn’t find the correct way to draw breath into my body.
“Your daddy was smarter than me and always has been,” I told him honestly. “Don’t let him fool you. That’s what gets everybody—the pretty face.”
Rome snorted and came to sit down next to his son.
Liner took the seat to my right and it was only then that I realized Tara was not only gone from the room, but she’d left the house entirely. I heard her car start up outside and peel out of the driveway.
Moments after that, I heard something crash.
Liner stood up. “If she hit my bike, I’m going to stab her.”
I winced, but the little boy didn’t seem to notice anyone’s bad words because he was still focused on me. “Daddy says you have a girlfriend.”
I felt something inside my chest squeeze even tighter.
While I was away, for four goddamn years of this little boy’s life, Rome never once stopped talking about me like I was still his best friend. He’d told his little boy everything there was to know about me, I had no doubt about it.
“Her name is Reagan. She wanted to come today, but she plays in the dirt for a living and had to work,” I said through a lump in my throat.
Matias’s smile lit his entire face. “I love playing in the dirt.”
I looked at Rome, whose face was once again shut down. He looked just as haunted on the outside as I felt on the inside.
He never was good at hiding his emotions.
I turned back to Matias.
“It was only the trash can…I’ll go get the shit off the street,” Liner muttered somewhere behind me.
I didn’t look away from the little boy. “I live by the lake. When you’re feeling up to it, your daddy can bring you out and you can play in the dirt and mud with Reagan.”
Matias’s eyes drooped, then closed. “I’d like that, Uncle Tyler.”
I felt tears hit my eyes.
“Rome…God.”
Rome lifted his hand and placed it on top of the boy’s bald head. “I should’ve tried harder.”
I knew what he meant.
Between us, he should’ve made more of an effort.
“I didn’t make that easy for you,” I disagreed, giving him my eyes. “And you know it.”
Rome shrugged. “I would’ve…but whether you think so or not, I did betray you. All the little details were there. I mean, how many fuckin’ Taras would know where I lived and would be invited into one of my parties? God damn, I was so stupid. But…then she got pregnant and I didn’t think about anything but my betrayal to you anymore.” He leaned forward and pressed his closed fists to his eyes. “I had grand plans of apologizing. Of making it right…but those plans crashed and burned.”
He didn’t have to tell me what crashed and burned. I knew what.
“I’m such an asshole,” I told him. “Tara made me crazy and we were already in a bad place. I should’ve seen past my anger, should’ve given you a chance to explain—and honestly? None of it was really aimed at you—or at least it shouldn’t have been. It should’ve been all on her. She knew what she was doing and knew damn well and good who you were to me. She used to stare at your face whenever it came on during every single game night, listening to me tell stories about you.”
Rome groaned and looked up. “I don’t know what to do.”
The change of subject had me staring at him with a deep understanding.
“You fight. For him,” I told him. “You keep fighting until that’s all you can think about doing. You have it in you, Rome.”