Total pages in book: 74
Estimated words: 72060 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 360(@200wpm)___ 288(@250wpm)___ 240(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 72060 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 360(@200wpm)___ 288(@250wpm)___ 240(@300wpm)
“Jesus, Dex. Do you even realize how wonderful you are? How beautiful? I want that for you too. For someone to make you smile.”
My heart aches with a different sort of longing as we silently watch each other.
“You make me smile.” His expression is filled with melancholy. “Other than that, I make my own happiness. That’s all that matters.”
Dex angles his head to kiss my temple, something he’s always done, but this time, it feels more intense, almost gloomy. “You’re free to stay.”
“But it’s not even our third date yet,” I tease.
He bites back a yawn as he moves his computer to the floor. “We can always pretend it is if it makes you feel more comfortable sleeping over.”
After he closes his eyes, I watch his breaths softly even out as all sorts of thoughts and emotions consume me.
My fingers itch to touch again, but I don’t want to wake him. Instead, I angle a bit closer and study his mouth, how his bottom lip is fuller than the top, and wonder if they’re as soft as they look. Before I know what I’m doing, I close my eyes and pretend. Pretend that I’ve closed the distance between us and that our lips are meeting.
“What are you doing?” Dex murmurs.
I spring back. “Oh shit, s-sorry, I th-thought you were asleep.”
His eyes blink open. “Not when I can feel your breath on my face.”
“I didn’t mean to get that close. I was just imagining…” I trail my fingers down my face, mortified.
“I don’t mind.” He reaches for my hand to steady me. “Tell me what you were imagining.”
“Just what the end of a real date might be like when you like, you know…” My face is flaming hot. “Make out with someone.”
He frowns. “Have you never made out with anyone?”
“Not really,” I admit. “I’ve kissed a handful of guys, but none of it was like full-on tongue.”
He intertwines our fingers. “Guess that’s something else we have in common because I try to avoid kissing.”
“Why?”
“Because it’s just a hookup, a quickie. I don’t know most of them.”
“But you have sex with them, so what am I missing?”
“There’s protection involved. It’s strictly physical.”
“Isn’t kissing physical?”
“Okay, you got me.” He sighs. “Suppose there’s no one I wanted to stay with and kiss afterward.”
I blink in surprise. “Guess that makes sense.”
“Can you shut up about it now?” he teases. “Or do I need to do it for you?”
When he cups my cheek, I can see the raw affection in his eyes, and it makes me ache with want and need.
“How do you propose to shut me—”
His lips press against mine, once, twice, before I’m gripping his shoulder and getting as close as possible. He smells like Dex and tastes exactly as I imagined, a mix of mint and beer, as his soft mouth grows more zealous. Our tongues flick and tangle, sending a lightning storm through me.
And then our hands are frantically reaching, our teeth clanging, our mouths eagerly meeting again and again until we’re full-on kissing, deep and long, and I don’t know whose groans are louder. We kiss until my lips feel tender and we pull away, breathless. I lick my dry lips as I pant softly, and then Dex is already pulling me back for more.
We break apart when we hear the doorknob jiggling.
Milo sweeps inside the room, then stills upon seeing us. “Shit, sorry. I didn’t know—”
“No biggie,” I reply, sitting up. “We fell asleep watching a movie.”
I hope he doesn’t notice how hard I am as I slip back into my sneakers.
“I’ll walk you out,” Dex says, pushing the covers aside.
“No thanks, Dad,” I jest. “I got it. See you later.”
And then I slip out the door, glad for the cool nip of nighttime air against my heated skin.
23
DEX
I’m in my room Monday night after grabbing a quick bite because I need to write up my portion of the group project. I can’t stop thinking about the make-out session with Austin the other night. Not only because it was hot but also because it felt like more. Intimate and special, even under the guise of pretending it was the end of a date night that wasn’t one at all. But somehow, phrasing it that way helped me—and likely Austin too—ignore that the vibe has shifted between us recently.
It’s messing with my head because I can’t seem to stop thinking about how adorable and attractive my best friend is. I’m just grateful he’s not acting too awkwardly around me—other than his cheeks turning rosy across the dining hall table like he’s remembering too.
And while I’m trying to give him a good dating experience, I haven’t even done anything to relieve all the sexual tension left over from those nights with him. But it feels wrong to seek someone out. Which is strange, to say the least. It’s like I don’t want to disappoint him or let him down while we’re role-playing. Austin has high standards, and yet he doesn’t know how to convey to others that he’s totally relationship material. He and Mom seem to have that in common.