Total pages in book: 74
Estimated words: 72060 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 360(@200wpm)___ 288(@250wpm)___ 240(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 72060 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 360(@200wpm)___ 288(@250wpm)___ 240(@300wpm)
I recognize some familiar faces in the crowd. Austin hasn’t belonged to any groups since middle school, but I think there’s a certain camaraderie to being part of something like this. Association member or not, everyone is friendly. I wave to Jason, who’s talking to a group of people. It’s actually his older brother Steve who organized the club during his time at FU, but Jason seems to have taken the helm well.
Jason motions over someone’s shoulder to us. “Drinks are in the coolers.”
“Thanks!” I squat to open a lid. “I’m gonna grab a beer. How about you?”
“Sounds good.”
I use the opener to pop the caps, then pass one to Austin.
14
AUSTIN
It’s crowded around the bonfire, and there’s music piping from someone’s phone. I try to ignore that panicky feeling in my gut because I can see the ocean, which reminds me that we’re outside and I can escape if I feel overwhelmed.
The beer warms my stomach, and it’s exactly what I need. This definitely feels different from being here with Dex as just friends. It’s eye-opening how much of a hot mess I’d be on a real date. If Dex hadn’t been pretending with me, I might’ve already been ditched at the restaurant.
Jason approaches as we’re enjoying the fire. He’s always passing out flyers on campus, and he’s super friendly.
He and Dex fist-bump before he turns to me. “Austin, right?”
“Yeah, how did you…?”
“Dex talks about you all the time.” That swoopy stomach thing happens again.
“Don’t give him a big head.” Dex winks.
“As if,” I scoff.
Jason snickers. “Hey, if you’re interested in doing more outings with the club, we have our color-coded mixer at Love Shack next week.”
Love Shack is the local LGBTQ+ club that many on campus frequent.
“Cool, thanks!” Dex replies, and I nod. “We’ll think about it.”
I watch as Jason is approached by a few others at the party.
“What does that mean—color-coded?” I ask Dex.
“It depends on the event. The party I attended last year was at that Navy SEAL bar during Fleet Week. They handed out stickers to indicate whether you were top, bottom, or vers.”
“Oh God.” I cover my face with my hands. “I would die announcing that to anyone.”
“No you wouldn’t.” He presses his shoulder against mine. “It’s fun and gets conversations going with total strangers. That’s the whole point, I suppose.”
“Conversations about sex?”
“Sometimes.” He averts his eyes as if remembering a particular hookup from the night. “Do you know your preferences yet?”
My face feels hot and not just from the fire. “I think I have a good enough idea.”
“Well, now my curiosity is piqued.”
“Maybe you’ll find out someday.” My eyes widen when I realize how that sounds. “I didn’t mean—”
He smirks. “As your date, I’m flattered you’ve considered the idea.”
“What if, as my date, we’re not compatible sexually? Doesn’t that happen sometimes?”
“It does. Guess it helps that I enjoy topping, but I’m also vers,” he says with a wink.
For some reason, this conversation is making my dick plump. Christ. I really am inexperienced and horny. Dex talks about his sex life plenty, but in this context—with Dex referring to an imaginary hookup with me as his date—it not only feels strange but also arousing.
I try for a change of subject. “How come you never told me about the color-coded thing?”
“I don’t know. You don’t tell me everything either. Dildo Baggins, for example.”
“Shut up!” I look around as I shush him. “You know I’m not as comfortable talking openly about that stuff as you are.”
“You’re right. Sorry.” He pulls on my arm. “How about I make it up to you by showing you my dance moves?”
I look over at the students improvising in the sand.
“Uh, that wasn’t part of the deal,” I point out.
“Our dating parameters weren’t that explicit.” He pumps his eyebrows. “Come on, it’ll give you practice. Just follow my lead.”
He steers me toward the others enjoying the emotional ballad, and I don’t protest because the truth is, my curiosity is piqued. He takes my hands and places them on his shoulders before winding his own around my waist. My skin prickles as he starts swaying. “See how easy it is? Just move your feet side to side.”
Before I know it, I’m slow-dancing with Dex, and all my senses are on overload. Especially when he pulls me closer and I feel his breath against my neck. It dawns on me how hyperaware of him I am tonight. I know he’s only playacting, but this feels really fucking intimate to me.
When the song ends, I step back and break our hold. “I think I need some space.”
I head toward the water’s edge, sucking in fresh air as I go.
Just as I wonder how I’m supposed to explain my behavior to Dex, he appears behind me. “I’m sorry if I did something to upset you.”
“You didn’t.” I sigh. “I just want that with someone so badly that only pretending felt overwhelming.”